


Recurrence

by Welfycat



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-10
Updated: 2011-09-10
Packaged: 2017-10-23 14:41:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 46,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/251465
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Welfycat/pseuds/Welfycat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A visit to a new set of allies in the Pegasus Galaxy leaves John Sheppard and Rodney McKay struggling to overcome the effects of an alien device, while Evan Lorne and the other members of their teams try to help in any way they can.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Additional Content Notes: minor character death, brief discussion of non-graphic sexual child abuse  
> Author Notes: A million and one thanks goes out to my incredible beta [emeraldsnakes](http://emeraldsnakes.livejournal.com/) (any remaining mistakes are solely my fault) and to my moral and writing support [race_the_ace](http://race-the-ace.livejournal.com/). They have prompted me and held my hand and answered my million and one questions and generally nudged me along until I actually finished. Thank you so much, and I have all the love in the world for you both.

"Your help in increasing our defenses against the Wraith has been greatly appreciated. If the Wraith had come while the shield that masks the signature of the village was nonfunctional, I doubt there would have been any of us left. The last two cullings have left our population on the brink of extinction," Diwyn said, standing at the edge of the mountain side and watching as the rest of his people traveled back into their mountain dwelling.

"We were fortunate that there was a significant deposit of the minerals that were required to repair your shield. There is nothing like it in our city and I'm uncertain that Doctor McKay would have been able to fix it without the correct materials," Teyla said with a smile. "And the trade of crops that we've established will be beneficial to our people as well."

"I could have fixed it, and without having to open up my hands on that rock too," Rodney said with more than a hint of irritation. "It's a very simple system, actually, once you know what you're looking at. Your mechanics should have no problem maintaining it once they know what to do."

John smiled and stepped in between Rodney and Diwyn, far too used to leaders taking offense at Rodney's more than direct way of phrasing things. "What he means to say is that it was no trouble at all. We're happy to help our neighbors in this galaxy."

Diwyn turned to John and nodded. "Of course. And none of this would have been possible without your willingness to persuade your leader to help us. You are truly blessed by one of the Greater Spirits with honor and generosity."

"Well, I don't know about that," John said, feeling a little uncomfortable at the compliment even as Rodney made a disbelieving noise from behind him.

"It was our pleasure to help," Teyla said smoothly before either John or Rodney had a chance to respond. "Protecting people from the Wraith is one of the most important things we can do. There is no chance at successfully driving them from the galaxy if there is no one left to mount the offensive."

"I'm going to go check in with Ronon and Major Lorne," John said quickly, motioning out to where the fields were being harvested.

Diwyn bowed his head again. "Naturally. I understand very well what it is like to be separated from my people on a planet that is not my own. You and your people are joining us for an early evening meal tonight to celebrate the new trade and our ability to return to our ancestral homes, correct?"

Teyla smiled. "We'd be honored."

"Absolutely." John smiled too, the same artificial smile he'd been smiling the entire day as he and Teyla worked on a trade agreement with the Kamma Ket, as the people of P2X-977 called themselves. Really, Teyla had done most of the work even though Diwyn and his associate Marca looked to John for the answer at every opportunity. In the end, John had settled for stumbling through whatever he could come up with and letting Teyla provide clarification. Next time he was sending Elizabeth, even if he typically didn't enjoy sending her off-world unless it was necessary. He turned and walked down the gentle slope in the direction of the nearby fields, rolling his eyes when he heard Rodney's footsteps rushing to catch up with him.

"About time. I thought they'd go on forever," Rodney said as his steps fell in with John's.

"You didn't have to spend all day trying to talk with them. Every few minutes we had to stop and thank each other for the newfound friendship and bond between our peoples. This is why I'm not a diplomat. I hate this stuff," John grumbled, letting a little of the frustration from the hours he'd spent confined in a small office in the mountain side show through. As much as he'd had a lot of practice over the past two years helping with harvests, and it wasn't his favorite way to spend his time, he'd rather be doing something active than sitting around talking. Anything but talking.

Rodney held out his hands in front of him so that John could see the bandages on several of his fingers. "I suppose you'd rather have been pulling apart a stone age generator and chiseling pieces of conductive rock?"

John pretended to weigh the options and rolled his eyes at Rodney.

"Oh, I know. You'd rather be out in the fields with Lorne. Trying to sneak away for a romantic tryst!" Rodney exclaimed.

"First of all, no. Evan and I are responsible, we wouldn't go running off on an unknown world so that we could..." John trailed off and shook his head. "Second off all: 'tryst'? Who says romantic tryst?"

Rodney shrugged. "So I've read a couple of romance novels, I was thirteen and bored; sue me."

John didn't have anything he could say to that, though he filed the knowledge away as potential blackmail and teasing material. He'd feel guilty about that, but Rodney gave as good as he got and then some. Ever since Rodney had learned that John and Evan were dating, though dating didn't really feel like the right word for their situation, he had taken almost every opportunity to make suggestive comments about it to John. If John didn't know that it was just Rodney's bizarre way of showing that he was supportive of his and Evan's relationship, he'd have been a little disturbed and offended. As it was, after Evan had come to John's quarters late one night and told John that Rodney had threatened to space Evan if he ever hurt John, John had accepted that Rodney was just trying to look out for him. After John had laughed his ass off, though Evan hadn't been nearly as amused.

"Was it worth it?" Rodney asked suddenly.

"What?" John asked as he scanned out over the fields. He could see groups of the Kamma Ket coming toward the mountain, all carrying tools or pulling small carts. Every now and then he could see the dark uniform shirt of one of the marines who had been brought with them to help with the harvest and repairs to the mountain village; there were twenty marines total, not including the two lieutenants from Lorne's team, and he could see Lorne's botanist talking cheerfully with one of the natives at the front of the group.

"The man hours we're using to come help these people. Their population isn't big enough that they can survived beyond a few generations, and that's if they're lucky," Rodney said as he stood next to John and watched the people working the harvest.

"They're giving us a good portion of their harvest at a more than reasonable price, they don't have enough people to bring in the harvest by themselves, or to use it all before it would spoil. Selling it at the off-world markets would take more resources than they have this season. Besides, if we have to evacuate this will be one of the worlds we can fall back to. It's reasonably well protected from the Wraith and they have more than enough space to house the population of Atlantis," John reasoned.

"Well enough protected that they're almost extinct," Rodney pointed out. He sighed and ran his hands through his already messy hair. "I'm tired of arriving on worlds we're too late to help."

John nodded because he felt the same. He was beyond tired of seeing empty cities and burned fields, and it didn't take any one who was particularly observant to see how much it hurt Teyla and Ronon. "We did help. You fixed their shield thing, right?"

"Fixed is a bit strong of a world. I made it work again, but it was only intended to cover the section of the mountain where the main village is. I extended the protection as far as I could while maintaining the stability of the system, but if the Wraith come and anyone is out in the fields or out hunting, the Wraith wouldn't have any trouble finding them. The shield protects them from being noticed by the sensors on the Wraith Darts, but it won't do anything to stop the Wraith from seeing them with their eyes," Rodney sighed and looked at his hands. "I'm trying to teach their mechanics how to maintain the system, but their version of mechanics are stone carvers and people who work with very rudimentary farm equipment."

John nodded and put on his sunglasses as the setting sun hit an angle that sent the rays directly at them. "Then we'll schedule someone from your department to come check on it every month."

"Won't stop their population from dying out," Rodney pointed out. "Probably within four generations if there are no more cullings."

"They're not isolationists. I'm sure that they'll find other populations to intermarry with," John said firmly. Sometimes he thought that having Rodney on his team made him the optimist by default, as long as technology wasn't involved somehow. John was pretty sure if they had anything on Atlantis that would magically grow this planet's population, Rodney would be through the 'gate and trying to convince Elizabeth to let him try it out on the Kamma Ket. Despite the pessimism and sometimes blunt statements, John had discovered that Rodney actually cared about the planets and people they came across, maybe cared too much. "Look, there's Ronon and Evan. Let's go inform them that we have invites to dinner."

"Well, on the bright side I haven't seen anything resembling citrus on this planet," Rodney said as they walked toward Ronon and Evan, Evan raising his hand to wave at them as he rested some kind of farm implement over his shoulder with his other hand.

John waved back, unable to stop the small smile that tugged at the corners of his mouth. He supposed that made him a bit of a sap, to be happy just to see Evan after a day of being separated, but he found that he hadn't been able to stop himself once it had started. "See, things are looking up already," he pointed out.

"If only they had chocolate. Or coffee, or-"

"Yes, I know your wish list," John said. They made it to where Suanna, who had been introduced in the morning as the person who was in charge of the harvest and the village storerooms, was currently directing traffic.

"Good harvest?" John asked as they stood to the side so they didn't block traffic of the carts and wagons.

Suanna nodded, her hair fiery and wild in the light of the early sunset. "Excellent harvest. If the rest of our people were still here, it would have easily fed all of us through the winter."

John nodded, well aware that the people of the village were still grieving from the most recent Wraith attack. "The portion of the harvest that is going to our home in trade will help feed many of our people. Do you need another team of marines here tomorrow to help with the rest of the harvest?"

"No, there isn't much left to do and we can prepare the fields for winter at our leisure. Your young men and women are very strong and capable. I can imagine that your world must thrive despite the Wraith," Suanna said with a quick glance to where Ronon and Lorne were walking toward them.

"We manage. We've lost people to the Wraith as well," Rodney said shortly.

"Everyone has, and I ask both the Greater and Lesser Spirits daily to provide whatever peace those taken by the Wraith can receive, no matter what world they were from," Suanna said. She reached out and placed her hand on Rodney's hand and squeezed briefly before letting go.

Rodney didn't object, despite the fact that Suanna's hands were visibly covered in grim and dirt, and John knew that the loss of a team that had three scientists in Rodney's department was still bothering him. It had been nearly a month, but as the numbers of people they'd lost to the Wraith grew it became harder to accept, not easier.

"Colonel, have you seen Doctor Parrish? I seem to have," Evan looked around the nearby area before continuing, "I seem to have misplaced him."

John smirked, mostly because he got to hear tales of woe concerning Evan's botanist wandering away almost every time Evan's team returned from a mission. Evan had only smacked John's arm, and not softly either, when John had suggested a leash or a tracking device after a particularly ridiculous mission. "I just saw Doctor Parrish a few minutes ago, Major. He was heading back toward the village with some of the Kamma Ket," John said, not missing the way Rodney rolled his eyes at their use of rank.

"Your harvest expert has been very valuable today, he has taught us much about the land. I believe I saw him walking with my nephew. They were quite deep in conversation about irrigation," Suanna volunteered as Ronon and Evan approached.

"Coughin, run ahead and radio me when you've found him," Evan ordered with a long suffering glance at John, who only smirked in return.

"Yes, sir," Coughlin said with a fond smile as he passed his gear off to Reed, the other marine lieutenant on Evan's team.

John reached out and took a piece of Evan's equipment from him and walked beside him as the group resumed their trek back to the village. "Everything go well out here?"

Evan nodded. "They're good people. Friendly, and the marines all seemed to enjoy themselves."

John glanced around them, noting that Reed and Rodney had dropped back a few steps and were chatting and not for the first time was grateful that his and Evan's teams had bonded so well. "I think you have a sunburn," he said, taking the moment where no one was watching to reach out and press his finger tips against the exposed and slightly reddened skin of Evan's forearm.

"A little bit," Evan agreed as he looked down to where John's hand had touched. "But in a week I'll have the best tan on Atlantis."

John laughed, wondering how it was that Evan knew how to make him laugh without seeming to try. "It's winter, I'm not sure there is much of a competition."

Evan just smiled. "Better than your tan. And I can prove it," he said quietly. "How did the trade negotiations go?"

"They went well, though Teyla might disagree with that if you ask her," John shrugged. "They don't seem like they have problems with women in authority, but they kept directing all their questions to me."

"Even after you made it clear that you couldn't negotiate your way out of a paper bag?" Evan teased.

"Hey! I negotiate just fine, when I have to. I just don't want Teyla to feel like we don't need her on the team," John said as they started the slow climb up to the village entrance in the mountain side, knowing that he was convincing no one, especially not himself.

"I'll get you the paper bag so you can practice," Rodney said as he passed them without looking back.

"Hey!" John said again, waving his free hand in the air. When Evan just started to laugh, John shot him a glare as well. "Traitor. Careful, I have the power to demote you."

Evan just grinned. "But then you'd be dating a lieutenant, and how would that look, Colonel?"

John rolled his eyes, pulling off his sunglasses so that Evan couldn't miss it. "I'm sure everyone would know that you deserved the demotion for driving me crazy."

"I'm pretty sure I'm the one keeping you sane," Evan said, his smile softening when John just raised his eyebrows. "Doing all your paper work so that you don't get the IOA on your case, again."

"For that, you're carrying your own farm equipment," John said, offloading the wood and metal tool back onto Evan before walking away to go join where Ronon was helping to unload one of the carts.

*****

The dinner with the Kamma Ket was unfortunately as dull and rigorous as the trade negotiations had been. Diwyn, Marca, and Suanna sat at the head of the large table in the ancestral hall, with John and Rodney sitting in between the group in positions of honor. Like the negotiations, the meal was stopped several times as different dishes were brought out, each time to thank one of the Greater or Lesser Spirits for the dish and then Suanna would tell the story of how that particular Spirit had brought the dish down for the Ancestors.

John had tried to appear as attentive as possible, though that became more and more difficult as there was less eating being done than talking. Only the fact that Rodney was at his side and behaving himself admirably kept John from wanting to rest his head down on the carved table in front of him. Instead, he kept his focus on Evan, who was seated further down the 'table of the ancestors' and was smirking at John every time it seemed like Marca or Suanna was finished but then would continue on. John vowed that he was going to do something cruel to Evan, like hide his sketch book or have Atlantis make all of his showers cold, or at least the showers that Evan took alone. Atlantis liked John better anyway, even though Evan was one of the strongest gene carriers on the city. That vow was only renewed when he saw that the people further down the table were sharing dishes freely while the only got to take a brief taste of things at the front table.

When they finally escaped the mountain, Teyla and Ronon leading the group while John and Evan brought up the rear, John sighed as his stomach growled. Evan just laughed.

"It's not funny, at least you got to eat," John said with a sigh as he turned around and did a quick head count for the third time to make sure no one had gotten left behind in the mountain with the Kamma Ket. Sometimes he thought his job was comparable to being an elementary school teacher on a very extended field trip.

"But the faces you were making when you thought no one was looking were priceless. You're lucky I didn't pull out the camera and post it on the internal server. I would have titled it 'Bored Military Commander at Diplomatic Event', or maybe 'Colonel Waits for Eternally Postponed Meal'. What do you think?" Evan asked, still far too cheerful for his own good.

John shook his head as he counted the last marine. "I think if you replace 'bored' with 'hungry' you would be right on the mark. I'm raiding the mess hall for leftovers when we get back."

"That took forever," Rodney said as he dropped his pack down next to John and began rummaging through it. "The next time we're required to attend a diplomatic dinner for the good of Atlantis, it better actually involve dinner."

"Actually, the different Spirits that they attribute each food to and the folklore involved is fascinating. Well, from an anthropological point of view, not scientific, but even so," David Parrish said as he bounded cheerfully up to the group.

Fortunately Rodney's mouth was occupied by half of a power bar and he couldn't respond with any more than a muffled grunt. It had taken John and Evan two months to get Rodney to stop saying that botany was not a real science, at least not in the presence of David, and it would be a shame to undo all that work.

"Let's get back to the 'gate. I'm not sure how much time we have before the sun actually sets, considering it looked like it was setting when we went inside and that was hours ago. And the last time we walked back in the dark someone got a sprained ankle," John said, adjusting his pack as he once again checked that they had everyone, including Evan's botanist, and then gave the signal to Teyla and Ronon to start the group heading forward.

"That wasn't my fault," Rodney said, his voice still muffled by the power bar. "How was that my fault? I couldn't see where I was going and you kept telling me to run."

"We know, Rodney. But a sprained ankle was better than letting those creatures get you. How did you describe them, John? Like wolves crossed with sharks on steroids?" Evan asked.

"It was bears. Bears crossed with sharks on steroids," John said firmly. "That's what they looked like, fins and everything."

They were all quiet for a long moment as they started walking, Rodney grabbing his pack at the very last moment and rushing to keep up with the group.

"Wait, why would a bear need fins? That doesn't make any sense from an evolutionary stand point," David said suddenly, coming to a halt as he thought.

Evan went back a few steps and got David walking again.

"That's the point, it was unnatural. Uncanny. Disturbing," John said with a frown as he remembered the creatures he'd only barely caught sight of before they'd been pursued.

"Can we change the subject before he comes up with more adjectives?" Rodney asked, trying to dig in his pack and walk at the same time.

"Back, retreat back to the mountain," Ronon's voice came over their radios loud and urgent.

Teyla's voice joined Ronon's a moment later. "Five Wraith Darts, heading our way."

All the marines in their group moved in sync, readying their weapons as the group turned back toward the refuge of the mountain.

"Split up, stay under as much cover as you can," John ordered, struggling to keep his eyes on the group as the whine of a Dart ship sounded in the distance.

Everyone moved quickly, breaking into smaller teams and leaving the trail they'd been following back to the 'gate. John stayed with Rodney, Evan and David, urging them further back into the forest as the still setting sun streamed through the trunks. They were close to the shadow of the mountain, close enough that when John ducked back out on the path to urge a pair of corporals back into the other side of the forest he could see the gates where Rodney had indicated the end of the shield's protection.

John reached to his radio. "Get past the gates and find cover. The dart's sensors won't be able to find you once you're beyond the gates, but they'll still be able to see you if there are Wraith soldiers on the ground."

He rejoined Rodney and Evan just in time to hear Evan say "damn it, Parrish" before disappearing back into the forest.

Rodney paused, ready to go back and help, but John shook his head and urged them both forward. Evan could take care of himself and his team without their help.

The gates surrounding the mostly underground village of the Kamma Ket were mostly ceremonial posts connected to a wall that had deteriorated badly over the years. Getting into the protected area wouldn't be a problem even as they hurried through the thinning forest and ascended the moderate slope up the start of the mountain.

About five minutes later, stumbling over exposed roots as branches as the sun finished setting and plunged them into darkness, they crossed the wall and Rodney came to a sudden stop.

"We can't stay here," John said, placing a hand on Rodney's shoulder to urge him on.

"We're past the point the Darts can detect us, but I need to see if I can pick up Wraith life signs from here or if the interference is too much for Ancient technology," Rodney said, already twisting around to dig in one of his side pockets. "You want to know if there are any Wraith soldiers to worry about, don't you?"

John sighed and pulled Rodney behind a rock formation that was a dozen paces away, struggling to keep both of them on their feet. He did want to know, but that didn't mean he wanted to be out in the open where anyone could see them, presuming that the Wraith saw much better in the dark than humans did, while Rodney took the scan. "Well?" he asked when they were both crouched down.

"I can't see anything at the moment, inside the field or out. Give me a minute to recalibrate," Rodney said with a frown as he examine the life signs detector.

"Give it here," John said, not waiting for Rodney's protests as he took the device and thought at it with all the concentration he could spare. Sometimes using the ATA gene to force things along was a lot faster than fiddling with the programing of various bits and pieces of Ancient technology.

He could almost feel the way the programing rewrote itself, rearranging the way it worked at John's will and whim. It was a little unsettling when that happened, usually he could just feel a simple request for information being processed, but it was a little strange to know that he could actually change the way the technology worked just by directing his thoughts.

"There," John said and handed the device back to Rodney, who was more than slightly pissed off by the way he tugged the life signs detector from John's hands.

"I could have done it," Rodney grumbled as he examined the screen.

John shrugged even though no one could see it in the dark. "My way was faster."

"Okay, quiet. There are six Wraith soldiers in the forest, fairly close by, but they aren't moving quickly or directly toward the mountain," Rodney said as he examined the device.

"Sheppard, what's your location?" Ronon's voice called through the radio.

"Pile of rocks toward the dark side of the front gates. We're maybe five minutes from the main entrance hall," John said quietly, looking around in the dim moonlight but not wanting to risk taking out a flashlight just yet.

"We've been greeted by the Kamma Ket. If you are safe to do so, you should make your way to the side entrance that overlooks the fields," Teyla said over the radio.

Rodney pocketed his scanner. "I know where that is, I went through there when I was fixing the shield. This way."

"On our way." John followed Rodney, both of them creeping along and doing their best not make a lot of noise that might alert the Wraith to their position.

They made it to the cave nearly ten minutes later, welcoming the dim light of Kamma Ket lanterns as they moved deeper into the cave and found Ronon, Teyla, and a group of marines waiting for them along with Marca at the back of the group.

"Is everyone here?" John asked before anyone else had a chance to speak.

"We have eight of the marines here with us, Lieutenant Coughlin has radioed us to let us know that he has fourteen, including himself and Reed. Have you seen Major Lorne and Doctor Parrish?" Teyla asked, her face tight with concern.

John felt his chest freeze for a moment before he turned back to the entrance of the cave, shrugging off Rodney's hand on his shoulder.

"John, wait. There are no human life signs in the forest," Rodney said, rushing forward to try and stop John from leaving.

Shrugging Rodney off again, John kept going as his heart pounded painfully in his chest.

"Sheppard, come in," John's radio came to life just as he reached the opening of the cave with his team at his heels.

"Evan, where the hell are you?" John snapped before he could stop himself, air rushing back into his lungs.

There was a moment of silence before Evan responded. "David and I are somewhere on the mountain, though I can't give you an exact location. A Wraith Dart overhead drove us off course and we didn't come out of the forest where we expected."

Rodney tapped into the radio. "Major Lorne, I believe I've found your location on the scanner. You need to come partway back down the mountain and head toward the fields you were working in today. We're in a cave that overlooks those fields."

"Copy that, we're on our way. Lorne out," Evan said before closing the connection.

John gave himself a brief moment to rest his hand against the wall of the cave, the cool touch of the stone helping to remind him where he was and that he still had responsibilities. When he looked up he found his team all surrounding him, their expressions concerned. Well, as much concern as Ronon ever expressed at least. John had gotten a lot better over the past two years at reading the minute changes in the way Ronon held himself or the way his eyes would flicker down or to the side and knowing what those changes meant.

"The Kamma Ket are willing to give us shelter until the Wraith have gone from this world," Teyla said quietly. "They're still in the process of resettling their own people but Marca has assured me there is room our people for as long as we need to stay."

John nodded. "As soon as Lorne and Parrish are here we can get everyone settled. Rodney, what's the situation with the Wraith?"

"We still have six Wraith on the ground and they're spreading out to conduct a search. They obviously know we were there," Rodney said, the ominous whine of a Wraith Dart overhead punctuating his words.

"When the rest of your people are here we should retreat further back into the village. We can disguise the tunnel entrances so that the Wraith will believe they are impassible. Our ancestors evaded the Wraith for many generators in these mountains," Marca said as he joined them at the entrance. "I trust that the rest of your people were successful in escaping the Wraith culling beams?"

John nodded shortly and looked out into the darkness, wishing he could go out there and find Evan himself. "The last two are on their way to this location. We just spoke to them."

"They're moving right toward us, no Wraith in their vicinity," Rodney said, still looking at his scanner.

"I thought you said you didn't see any human life signs a few minutes ago?" John asked, not sure he'd forgiven Rodney for scaring him like that.

Rodney frowned and handed the scanner over to John. "Well, I didn't expect them to be halfway up the mountain. I assumed all the life signs in that direction were members of the Kamma Ket. This thing isn't exactly specific about locations in more than two dimensions."

They all fell silent for a few minutes, John growing more impatient by the moment even as he watched the dots that represented Parrish and Lorne making their way toward the cave. Even though he could see that they were almost to safety, and knew that the shield prevented the Darts from sensing them, he couldn't help but imagining a culling beam coming and taking them from right in front of him. He'd seen it happen, more times than he could count; people, sometimes his people, running for safety and being taken as they closed in on the safe location and had no where to hide.

The sound of rocks crunching outside set them all on alert and a moment later Evan and David stumbled into the dimly lit cave.

Evan was half supporting David, who had dirt streaking his uniform and was limping.

John met Evan's eyes for a moment and received a minuscule nod that meant they were alright. "Cutting it close, Major," was all John could say, far too aware of everyone watching them.

"It was my fault, I tripped over the roots of a very large _Picea glauca_ and scrapped myself up a bit," David said sheepishly.

"Sure, he can name the tree but he can't stop himself from spraining his ankle falling over it," Evan joked, even though his eyes were still tight. He did a quick scan of the rest of the group that had gathered. "The rest of the marines?"

"They are helping to secure the front entrance," Teyla said quickly as she moved to the other side of David.

John swallowed and let himself relax a little as he urged everyone further back into the cave. "You might want to radio Reed and Coughlin and let them know you and David are here."

Evan nodded as he and Teyla helped David further back into the cave. "Yeah, they're pretty attached to Parrish. I can't imagine what they'd say if they thought I'd lost him."

John chuckled and shook his head, the back of his hand brushing very slightly against the back of Evan's free hand. "Just make sure it doesn't happen again. I don't think I can send you off-world if you keep misplacing the scientists," he said, the joking helping ease the tension of nearly losing Evan and David.

"I'm not something that can be misplaced," David said indignantly. "And it wasn't even my fault this time!"

"Of course not," Evan said soothingly as he exchanged glances with John.

"They never listen to me when I say that either," Rodney said, giving David a knowing nod.

Marca gave them an uncertain smile as he glanced over the group and paused where the cave widened and branched off. These caves had obviously been carved out and adapted by the Kamma Ket, and there were lanterns hanging in the hall every few yards. "I'll just secure the entrance and then we can go to the hall we have set up for your people for the night."

"Thank you, we'd appreciate that," John said. He and Rodney watched with no small amount of interest as Marca operated one of the machines that was built into the cave wall, a series of rocks appearing in the area they'd been standing in only moments before.

"It gives the appearance of a cave in, so should the Wraith wander this far they would not explore further," Marca explained when he saw John and Rodney watching.

"But it doesn't actually do anything to prevent the Wraith from entering?" John asked.

Marca frowned. "No, it is just a disguise, much as the shield that Doctor McKay fixed. But no Wraith has ever entered the caves of our ancestors."

John exchanged glances with Rodney and then looked out over the group of marines. "Jones and Gale, you're on guard duty at this entrance. Alert me if the Wraith approach."

"Yes, sir," the two marines said in unison as they separated themselves from the group and took up position at either side of the entryway.

"That's not necessary, although on behalf of my people I thank you for your concern and vigilance," Marca said, taking in the way the marines stood with their weapons ready with wide eyes.

"For the safety of both your people and mine, stationing guards at all the entrances is the best way of being prepared in case the Wraith start to investigate the caves. How many entrances are there to the village?" John asked calmly, not having any intention of leaving the entrances unguarded regardless of how badly he might be offending the Kamma Ket.

Marca bowed his head. "Your dedication is admirable. Beyond this entrance and the main gate there is one more way into the village. I will take you there myself once we have gotten your people settled and attended your wounded."

"I'm fine, no need to attend me," David called from where he was leaning half against the wall and half on Evan.

"Many of our people are skilled in the art of healing, I'm certain we can take care of Doctor Parrish, though we appreciate your offer of assistance," Teyla said smoothly before John had a chance to decline.

"As you wish. Please follow me," Marca said and led the way through the caves toward the main section of the underground village.

They walked past the ancestral hall, where they'd eaten dinner earlier, or where some of them got to eat dinner, John's stomach reminded him, and down a long hallway with a slow but steady decline. The chill in the air grew more pronounced as they went further and further underground, and finally reached a large chamber that was more like a cavern than anything they'd seen so far. The rest of the marines were already there and waiting, all of them immediately looking to John as he and the others filed in.

"I would have arranged for separate rooms, there are plenty of currently empty living areas in the village, but Diwyn believed that you would rather keep your people together tonight," Marca said as he looked over the room with a hint of distaste.

"This is great," John said quickly. "Let me just check-in with this group and you can take me to the third entrance you spoke of."

Evan, still helping David along, moved deeper into the room and began getting the rest of the group organized.

Reed, obviously relieved when he was Evan and David, came over to John immediately. "I left Coughlin and Rodgers to monitor the front entrance. The tech here seems a little unreliable," Reed said quietly with a quick glance over to where Marca was watching from the edge of the cavern.

"Good call," John said with a quick smile at the younger officer. "Help Major Lorne get everyone settled and set up a watch rotation consisting of six people for the entrances and two for this room. We're staying the night and with any luck the Wraith will be gone in the morning."

"Yes sir," Reed said immediately and hurried away to check in with Major Lorne.

John glanced over the gathered marines. "Fredricks, Stevens, with me!"

The two marines came over without hesitation and followed him back to Marca.

"If you'll show us the third entrance?" John asked.

Marca looked at the pair of marines and gave a nod that looked more bemused than anything else. "If you'll follow me."

The last thing John heard as he was leaving the room was Evan pulling off David's boot and saying that it seemed they'd have to amputate. John forced himself not to smile even though he was sure that if he heard David's response he wouldn't have been able to stop himself.

*****

John made it back to the cavern within thirty minutes and was pleased to see that everyone was close to settled for the night. The marines had grouped themselves together in sets of four and five and John saw that there was an empty place for him between his team and Evan's. David was leaning against one of the walls with his ankle wrapped and propped up and apparently deep in conversation with Reed about something, while Evan seemed to be chatting peacefully with Teyla.

"Everyone in place?" Evan asked, handing John both an MRE and a scrap of notebook paper with a guard rotation sketched out on it.

Grateful, John set down his pack and forced himself to look over the rotation before he handed it back and opened the MRE. "Yep. I dropped by and made sure Coughlin knew you and David made it back alright," John said, though the reason he had insisted on going all the way up to the main gate was because he wouldn't have been able to relax at all if he hadn't seen everyone with his own eyes. He wouldn't be able to sleep anyway, not while they were camped inside a village with the Wraith knocking at the front door, but he would have driven himself crazy if he hadn't gone to check on everyone. Marca had accepted the detour with the same tolerant and slightly puzzled expression but hadn't said anything more about leaving guards. John took the victory where he could get it, but was glad when Marca wandered away after guiding him back to the cavern.

"David will be fine, though he should get examined by Beckett when we get back to Atlantis," Evan said as he shifted on his bedroll so that John had a more comfortable place to sit.

"I already told you I don't need to see Beckett," David called, leaning back so that he could see both John and Evan.

Evan smirked. "I wasn't talking about your ankle, I was more thinking about getting your eyes checked. Or maybe your brain."

"Very funny," David sat back up again and went back to his conversation with Reed.

John smiled and then actually looked down at the MRE he was opening. "Lasagna?" he asked, turning his best reproachful look on Evan.

"It was either that or the chicken parmesan," Evan said without a hint of remorse.

"Chicken?" Rodney asked suddenly.

Evan rummaged in his pack and tossed the MRE to Rodney without a word.

John just sighed and activated the heating packet that would make the lasagna brick at least passably warm and started mixing the coffee in the pouch that came with it. If nothing else he could have some really bad coffee.

"Doctor Weir will probably try to dial in and send a radio call as soon as the Wraith release control," Evan said, not voicing the fact that they all knew their failure to return or report in within the past six hours would be causing concern on Atlantis.

"She will. Hopefully they'll be able to dial in during a time when the Wraith are trying to redial after the 48 minutes are up," John said as he dug through the MRE packaging and pulled out the little sugary cake that was included as dessert, examining it a moment before handing it over to Evan who accepted it with a small smile. "Either way, they won't send anyone through until they have more information."

Evan nodded and dug into the cake as John pulled out a packet of crackers and dug in. "We've camped in worse places," Evan offered hopefully.

John looked around; one group of the marines was playing poker while another group was egging them on, his team and Evan's were gathered together. Ronon was gamely stealing pieces of the chicken from Rodney and David was trying to beg for the dried fruit packet while citing his injury as a reason for Rodney to be nice to him. John knew that Rodney would give David the fruit packet, mostly because Rodney didn't actually want the fruit, but Rodney seemed to enjoy having David around as a surrogate kid brother to torment and tease a little bit before handing over the snack. "Yeah, we've definitely camped in worse places," John agreed, mostly thinking of Antarctica and spending his meal times alone. He hadn't felt lonely or isolated at the time - he had welcomed the silence - but this seemed a lot better.

"Hey, Sheppard, are you eating your peanut butter?" Rodney asked.

John tossed it over without a word and checked to see if the lasagna was ready yet. He dug in and decided that it wasn't half as bad as the odd green and black spotted thing the Kamma Ket had him taste at their 'dinner', and ate with more gusto than was probably appropriate for an MRE. He let his knee fall to the side and shared a small smile with Evan as their legs bumped together.

After an hour or so the marines settled down and people started to drift off to sleep. Rodney was out as soon as he checked with John that he wasn't taking a watch that night and the rest of the group followed soon. The lights in the cavern had automatically dimmed over time and John's assessment of the left-over technology that was built into the caves increased, though he supposed that shielding life signs and holographic rocks were a bit more impressive than lights on a timer.

He had pulled his bedroll out, mostly so that he wasn't sitting on the cold surface of the floor, but he had no intention of even trying to sleep. When he looked to his right he found Ronon wide awake as well, not even pretending to sleep, and Teyla's eyes opened frequently. To his left, David was asleep although his eyes opened and he shifted every time he accidentally jostled his ankle, and Reed drifted in and out of sleep at almost exactly forty five minute intervals. Evan was awake for the most part, John had spent enough time sleeping next to Evan to know when he was awake even when he was still, though he kept his eyes closed as he rested.

"Lie down for a bit, even if you don't sleep," Evan whispered to John shortly after the guard change and Coughlin had joined their group.

John took a quick look around the room again, taking in everything from the marines just off their watch getting settled to Rodney shifting and thrashing in his sleep. He spent an extra moment pulling Rodney's blanket up around his shoulders and checking that his own radio was in place in case one of the marines guarding the entrances called for him, and then lied down next to Evan.

It was almost like being back on Atlantis, when John let his eyes fall shut and ignored the sounds of two dozen other people around them, and he focused on the steady in and out of Evan's breathing next to him. Leaving his eyes shut, John placed his hand on the edge of Evan's bedroll and waited a brief moment before Evan's hand wrapped around his. John tightened his fingers, letting himself accept that the Wraith hadn't gotten Evan even though it had felt far too close for comfort. They may have joked about it, even about David getting hurt, but if the Wraith had been a little bit closer or the Dart had flown overhead at the moment when Evan was helping David up from falling, they would be gone.

Evan squeezed back reassuringly, as if he knew exactly what John was worrying about. Of course, Evan had probably been just as scared of losing him when they'd been separated, knowing that the Wraith were out there and could take any of them.

It wasn't until John's watch, synchronized with Atlantis, read just before six in the morning that his radio came to life with a short crackle.

"Weir to Colonel Sheppard, please respond. We have rescue teams ready to come through the 'gate at your disposal," Elizabeth Weir said, her voice cracking and breaking up as it made it through the distance and the mountain above them.

"Sheppard here. All members present and accounted for, no need to send the rescue parties," John said quickly as he pushed himself to his feet and carefully walked around the sleeping bodies of his and Evan's team even though most of them had already awoken at the sound of John's voice.

"Good to hear that, John," Elizabeth said, the relief evident in her voice even through the radio. "We were expecting you yesterday evening."

"Several Wraith Darts came through the 'gate last night just as we set out for home, but we were close to the Kamma Ket village and they sheltered us for the night. No casualties for the Kamma Ket or ourselves. The shield that McKay fixed seems to be functioning," John reported from the edge of the room, watching as everyone began to get up.

"I'm glad. When you've had the opportunity to thank the Kamma Ket for their hospitality, I'm sure you'll be heading back to Atlantis," Elizabeth said.

John smiled. "Yes, I think we're all pretty eager to get home."

"I'll see you soon. Weir out," Elizabeth said, cutting their connection.

John stepped forward, automatically gaining the attention of everyone in the room. "Get packed up and ready to go. As soon as we're sure the Wraith are no longer in the vicinity we're heading back to Atlantis."

The bustle of two dozen men and women moving all at once in the slowly brightening light of the lanterns was a little too much for John after the long day previously and the unrestful night, and he returned to wrap up his bedroll with a yawn.

"Wraith gone?" Evan asked from where he was tidying up his area.

"Seems like it, but I'm going to take the life signs detector to one of the entrances and make sure before I recall the guards," John said as he tucked his bedroll away. He reached over Rodney to dig in his pack.

"What are you looking for?" Rodney asked as he woke the rest of the way and rolled out of John's way.

"The scanner. I'm going to go check that the Wraith are actually gone and aren't just waiting for us to reappear," John said, coming up empty handed.

Rodney started pulling on his boots. "It's in my pocket. I'll come with you."

John was about to argue but he spotted Marca and Suanna at the edge of the cavern and got to his feet. "Be ready by the time I'm back." He walked over to the Kamma Ket and tried to smile, though he was pretty sure that his facial expression didn't quite resemble happiness. Evan liked to tell him that he always looked particularly grumpy when he was exhausted even if he was trying to put on a happy face.

"I trust your people are well?" Marca asked with a small bob of his head.

"Yes, thank you again for taking us in last night," John said quickly.

"It is a cruel people indeed who would not provide shelter when the Wraith come," Suanna said gravely. "I cannot imagine anyone would forsake the Spirits in such a manner."

"You'd be surprised," John said with a tight smile. "Our people are waiting for us to return, so if you don't mind we'll just check that the Wraith are gone and be on our way."

"You must stay for the morning meal with us. It is rare we have visitors and we would dishonor the Spirits if you left without being fed," Suanna said quickly.

Marca nodded. "That is true. The meal is already being prepared. If you'd like to check for the presence of the Wraith before we eat, I'm certain that would put everyone's concerns to rest."

John glanced back at his team, knowing full well what Teyla would be telling him to say right now even though what he really wanted to do was hightail it back to Atlantis and hope they were serving pancakes or waffles in the mess hall. "We'd be honored to join you for the morning meal. Doctor McKay and myself will just go and check for the Wraith before we do so," John said, mentally adding that if he found them they might as well invite them in for breakfast, because it would be the polite and diplomatic thing to do.

"We'll meet you in the ancestral hall. I believe you can find your way," Marca said before both he and Suanna retreated back into the hallway.

John dragged himself back over to his team. "McKay and I are going to go check on the status of the Wraith. Major, can you get everyone ready to go and then down to the ancestral hall for breakfast so we don't dishonor the Spirits?" He was sure he felt one of his eyes twitch as he asked the question.

Evan grinned. "Of course, sir."

John grabbed his pack and motioned to McKay who was getting to his feet and pulling his own pack on.

"I just hope they actually feed us this time," Rodney grumbled as they made their way through the hallway up to the main entrance.

"You and me both," John agreed quietly.

They reached the front entrance quickly enough, both of the marines standing guard snapping to attention as soon as they spotted John.

"At ease," John said quickly. "Report."

"Quiet all night, sir," one of the marines said.

Rodney stepped up to the edge of where the false cave wall started and peered at the scanner. "No Wraith in the vicinity. They must have left on the Darts."

John nodded, relieved that they weren't going to have to camp out with the Kamma Ket for the day. "Let's get breakfast and go home."

The marines followed John and Rodney back to the ancestral hall while John radioed the other marines who had been stationed at cave entrances to join them there. Everyone else had arrived and settled along the side of the giant table, his people comprising nearly a fifth of the people gathered in the hall. It was good to see all of his team, Evan's team, and the contingent of marines in one place, a reassurance that they were all safe.

John and Rodney made their way to join their team, a space left for them between where David was resting his ankle off the side of one of the benches and where Ronon was already spearing some kind of meat with his knife, when Diwyn approached them with Marca and Suanna at his sides.

"The Wraith have gone?" Diwyn asked immediately.

John pasted his smile on, aware that Rodney wasn't even making an attempt to appear pleased at being diverted from a meal yet again. "We didn't see any sign of them."

Diwyn bowed his head. "That is very fortunate. If you would both join us, we would like to thank you again for your assistance."

"That's not really necessary," John said quickly as he gently pushed Rodney's hand down from where he was pointing to the food spread out on the table. "You've thanked us more than enough already. We were very honored at the meal yesterday."

"It won't take but a few moments and then you can return to your people to for morning meal," Marca assured them.

"It would not do to displeasure the Greater Spirits by refusing a gift from them," Suanna added.

John kept his smile in place. "Of course. We'd be honored to receive a gift from the Greater Spirits."

"Thrilled," Rodney deadpanned when the trio of Kamma Ket looked to him.

Diwyn smiled. "Please follow us to the chamber of the ancestors. It is the last place where the Greater Spirits had direct contact with our people," Diwyn said with another bow before turning to lead the way.

John quickly turned and caught Evan's eye, managing to communicate with an eye roll, a slight tilt of his head, and raising one of his shoulders slightly that he had to go for an alien ritual and would return shortly.

Evan just grinned but slipped his hand to rest on his holstered gun, letting John know that he was amused but had John's back just in case.

Teyla nodded her approval and Ronon tossed a piece of fruit to Rodney, who just barely managed catch it and started to eat it as they exited back into the passageway.

As they walked down the hallway, leading deep into the mountain and further down than they'd stayed the previous night, John felt a slight prickle at the back of his neck and looked back more than once to check the area around him. Diwyn led the way, with Suanna and Marca bringing up the tail end of their group, and John was starting to feel more like this was an escort than it was an optional gathering. The Kamma Ket weren't threatening; John hadn't seen any weapons or any indications of violence within their culture. He should have known, he decided, even though there wasn't anything more than the itching feeling in the very center of his back to found his feelings on. It was always the peaceful, idyllic societies that were the threat, not the ones that had their weapons at hand and were openly distrustful of foreigners.

John glanced at Rodney, wondering how much he was picking up and how far they might get if they had to make a run for it. They still had their radios, and their weapons even though John hated the idea of pulling weapons on people who were empty-handed, but it meant that Evan would be able to rally the marines and their teams and get them to safety with ease. Rodney seemed equally tense, his eyes shifting from Diywn and back to Suanna and Marca before chancing a glance at John. John nodded ever so slightly to let Rodney know that he sensed whatever it was as well and Rodney's eyes widened.

Before they had a chance to do more than communicate their discomfort, Diwyn pushed aside a thick curtain that covered an opening in the wall and stepped inside. John wanted to balk, say that there was no way he was going in a creepy little cave probably to be sacrificed to the Kamma Ket's spirits as a bribe to keep their people safe from the Wraith. It wouldn't be the first time a village had tried to sacrifice either one or all of his team, though usually they had the decency to feed them first. Well, either that or carve symbols on them, but John wasn't ready to judge the Kamma Ket's sacrificial rituals until he was tied down on the alter.

"I assure you nothing untoward is going to happen," Suanna said, reaching up and gently cupping John's jaw. "It saddens me that you have seen so much in the worlds among the stars that you have cause to fear us."

Marca nodded, his expression grim, and then stepped inside the chamber. Suanna followed, after pausing to rest her hand on Rodney's forearm, leaving John and Rodney out in the hallway by themselves.

Rodney turned to John, his eyes wide. "Well?"

John sighed and looked at the way back to the surface and the rest of their people. He figured that if they were to walk away, Diwyn wouldn't stop them. But apparently it was also 'dishonorable' to refuse a gift from the Kamma Ket's Spirits, and dishonor probably included lack of trade agreements. John did not want to see Elizabeth's face if he came back without securing the trade they'd gone to this planet specifically for, and that wasn't even mentioning the accepting yet slightly disappointed look Teyla would give him.

"At the first sign of trouble, radio Evan and get out. Don't wait for anything, just run back to everyone else, they'll send a team for me," John instructed, holding Rodney's gaze.

Rodney swallowed hard but nodded. "You don't have to worry about me trying to save you. You know I'll let the more capable members of our team pull off the non-technological rescues."

John actually doubted that very much. Two years ago, when they'd first been stumbling through the Pegasus galaxy without a clue of what they were getting themselves into, maybe, though John actually didn't think that was the case either. Rodney wasn't always the first one to go racing toward an explosion or a firefight, or the first one to reach for his gun, but he was fiercely loyal and determined. "Alright. Let's do this," John said. He turned and stepped over the small ledge that separated the chamber from the hallway, the first place he'd seen in the Kamma Ket caves that wasn't smoothed and rounded.

Rodney followed him and they both hesitated in the entrance. There were no blades, no alters, nothing that looked even remotely dangerous, though they had all learned that weapons came in many forms.

"If you'd just step inside and let the curtain fall shut. The Greater Spirits prefer not to do their work in the open," Suanna said, smiling as she looked at them.

John stepped the rest of the way into the room with Rodney at his side, the fabric dropping back down so they were all gathered in the small chamber. It was only then that he realized the chamber was lit with different lights than the lanterns in the hallways and other rooms, these ones were brighter and the coloring seemed more artificial and almost florescent.

"Please move into the circle, so we may call upon the Spirits. You may decide which of you goes first," Marca instructed as the three Kamma Ket arranged themselves around the circle. They each stood equal distance apart, grooves at the edge of the circle indicating their places.

Doing a quick visual examination, John decided that the markings were just metal inlays in the surface of the rock and not anything like a ring transporter. He stepped inside, giving Rodney another look that meant he was to call for help at the first sign of trouble.

Rodney nodded again as he got the message loud and clear.

"So, what kind of gift is this?" John asked, hoping for once that they were just in for a little chanting and light flickering. While he didn't believe in 'spirits' per say, he'd seen plenty of strange things that might pass as 'spirits' or 'ghosts' and they had encountered cultures who had small ways of communicating with the Ancients.

Diwyn looked solemnly at John. "You have been blessed by the Greater and Lesser Spirits in many ways, a truly courageous leader who cares deeply for both your own people and others who are threatened by the Wraith. Your companion is equally blessed with intellect and ability, and a remarkably quick tongue."

John glanced at Rodney with his eyebrows raised incredulously and saw that Rodney was startled by the description but also had a small smile of pleasure.

"Which is why we call upon the Greater Spirits to relieve you of the burdens that plague you," Suanna said firmly. She, Diwyn and Marca began to chant, their eyes closing in unison.

John typically associated the phrase 'relieving of burdens' with ascension and took a step toward the edge of the circle.

Rodney looked equally alarmed, his hand already reaching to activate his radio.

John managed to take one step before a wave of dizziness over took him and he found himself on his knees. He opened his mouth to tell Rodney to run but couldn't get his tongue and his lips to cooperate. A high pitched keening filled the air and it took John a moment to realize that it was coming from him. He kept his eyes locked on Rodney, watching as Rodney called for help and then rushed forward into the circle obviously intent on pulling John out. There was a brief moment where he had enough clarity to think that he had told Rodney to run before John's vision darkened and he lost awareness of everything except for the sharp edges ripping through his brain and burrowing under his skin.

*****


	2. Chapter 2

Evan twisted around on the bench for what felt like the twelfth time in as many minutes, but was probably closer to the fifth, and checked the entrance to the ancestors hall. There was still no sign of John and Rodney or the three Kamma Ket who seemed to have grown attached to them.

It was something Evan could understand, in a way. When he took his team off-world, it was usually David who got most of the attention from the native population. David was different than the rest of the team, more enthusiastic and more trusting; on more than one occasion the village had taken to them just because David had grinned and commented on the local wildlife or a garden in their town square. Then again, David was usually the one on the team getting kidnapped or held hostage. Evan figured that John and Rodney were kind of like that; brilliant and special, and in Rodney's case, loud and expressive. It drew attention to them, even though that was never their intention, and as a result any of the crazy that came from the locals was usually directed at them.

Teyla caught his eye as Evan turned back to the table and gave one of her most understanding looks and a calming nod. She was used to being off-world with John and Rodney, and used to having to decide how long they should wait before they went to the rescue whether or not the rescue was needed. Evan just wanted to leap out of his seat, round up a pair of the toughest marines in their group and demand that the Kamma Ket leave John alone, and Rodney too.

"I'm sure they'll be back soon, sir," Reed said, leaning over David and handing Evan a piece of bread.

Evan looked down at the bread and realized that he hadn't eaten anything since John and Rodney had disappeared. It wasn't exactly funny that the Kamma Ket were keeping John and Rodney from eating, and he would have been downright pissed off if they'd been dependent on the Kamma Ket for food, but the situation had been at least a little amusing. Until they'd taken John and Rodney from the room.

"I'm sure," Evan agreed even though he wasn't sure at all and took a bite of the bread that was actually really good.

David shifted on the bench next to him, wincing as he bumped his ankle. "If you've got to go rescue them, take Reed and Coughlin. One of the other marines can help me get out of the mountain," he said quietly enough that Evan was the only one who could hear him.

Evan looked around and noticed that both Ronon and Teyla were paying attention to them without it being obvious. "How about this; Reed gets you out of the mountain and I'll take Coughlin, Ronon and Teyla. I think Ronon by himself is more than enough to take out of any of the Kamma Ket. All of them, probably."

David's smile was closer to a grimace and he looked down at the rest of his breakfast. "We shouldn't have stayed," he said.

A quick glance down the table confirmed what Evan already knew; none of the marines were happy about their commanding officer being taken away and none of them were at ease with continuing to be subject to the Kamma Ket's hospitality. Several of them caught his eye and gave slight nods, reassuring Evan that they were ready to leap to the rescue as soon as he gave the sign.

"I mean, I understand why we had to," David said quickly. "But we shouldn't have."

"I know," Evan said, putting down his bread. He looked around at the villagers, trying to get an indication of the general mood. They were all pretty much the same as yesterday; farmers and families who were getting ready for another day of work. If there was something happening, none of them knew about it. He had just swung his legs over the bench, ready to go get one of the Kamma Ket to bring him to John and Rodney no matter the diplomatic cost, when his radio activated.

"Help! John is-" was all that made it through before the connection was cut off.

"Rodney! Respond!" Evan barked into his radio as he got to his feet, the rest of the marines rising with him. When there was no answer, Evan turned to his teammates. "Reed, get Parrish and the rest of the marines out and to a safe distance. Send a forerunner to the 'gate and have them stand by to dial Atlantis for help if necessary. Coughlin, you're with me."

Ronon and Teyla were already exiting the ancestors hall at a quick pace and Evan and Coughlin rushed to keep up. Ronon took the lead, his tracking ability apparently not impeded by the smooth floors of the caves. Evan assumed that he was looking at patterns of unsettled dust or something similar, maybe he knew what John and Rodney smelled like and was tracking their scent - which was a vaguely disturbing thought to Evan, but at the moment he didn't care as long as it got them to John.

The five minute jog was done in silence, all of them ready to fight and all of them listening for any clues that might tell him where John and Rodney were being held. Their radios were eerily silent and it took Evan a moment to realize that the quiet, high pitched sound was not technology based and they were getting closer to it. Evan didn't want to know what could cause a human make that sound.

The sound cut off abruptly as they grew closer and their small group broke out into a full run through the winding passageway. Teyla saw the curtained entrance first and pushed through without a thought to what was on the other side, the rest of them following with their weapons at the ready.

Evan felt a jolt through his chest as he quickly assessed the room for threats and then focused on where John and Rodney were sprawled on the floor in the middle of a circle. Both of their faces were wet with blood, trails seeping from their nose and ears, and while Rodney was swaying as he tried to push himself off the ground, John was completely still.

"What did you do to them?" Teyla asked Diwyn as she moved between the Kamma Ket and where John and Rodney were on the floor.

Evan ignored the Kamma Ket entirely, Ronon and Teyla would take care of them if they even looked like they were about to sneeze, and dropped down on the floor to help John and Rodney. Coughlin was right by his side, gently guiding Rodney off of John. Evan rested his fingers against the side of John's neck and gave a rattled gasp for air as he felt John's pulse quick and steady. He used the edge of his sleeve to carefully wipe the blood on John's face away from his eyes and mouth, ignoring the way it dripped onto his hands and fingers stickier than paint.

Suanna, who Evan had met the day before during the harvest, let out a gasp as she looked down at John and Rodney. "They're hurt."

"Damn right they're hurt! What the hell did you do to them?" Coughlin snapped, his arms around Rodney as he tried to pull him from the circle.

A small part of him was surprised, despite the situation, because he'd only heard Coughlin swear once before and that's when the natives of P4C-383 had left David staked out in the desert as an offering to their gods. Deciding that moving out of the circle, which he figured was somehow related unless the Kamma Ket had developed psychic powers all of a sudden, was a good idea, Evan hooked his hands under John's shoulders and dragged him out of the circle toward the exit.

"This has never happened before. Our people have received gifts from the Spirits many times, and they have never fallen ill," Marca said. He moved toward Rodney but Coughlin glared and pulled Rodney further back.

Ronon took a step forward when Diwyn did, forcing Diwyn to move back away from everyone else. "What does this do?" he asked, pointing down the circle.

"It helps those who are suffering, and brings greater order and peace to their thoughts and memories," Suanna said as she leaned against the wall looking stricken.

Coughlin looked up, horrified. "You messed with their brains?"

"It was clear they were both suffering greatly. We wanted to help relieve their burdens," Marca said quietly.

The phrase was disturbingly familiar to Evan. "You mean like ascension? That kind of burden relieving?"

"We do not belong to any of the heathen cults that worship ascension," Diwyn said, sounding thoroughly offended. "It was never our intent to harm your people. We meant no offense."

"Well, where we're from, you don't just go messing in someone's head without permission," Coughlin snapped.

Evan felt John's pulse again, holding on the steady beat as proof that John was alive. As long as he was alive they could take another step. John showed no signs of surfacing or awareness of any kind. He started pulling John up to his knees, getting ready to heave him over his shoulders in a fireman's carry so they could get back to the 'gate. "Can we do this later?" he asked, his voice quiet though it carried through the chamber.

Ronon gave Diywn one last glare before moving over to Rodney and Coughlin, easily pulling Rodney's weight over his shoulder. "Let's go."

"Your people will return at a later date?" Diwyn asked. "I'm sure reparations can be made and our honor restored."

Fortunately Coughlin was busy holding John in a vertical position so Evan could crouch down and pull John over his shoulders, and neither of them had a chance to respond. As Evan stood, grateful that John was fairly lean but still wishing his own muscles and shoulder span were closer to Ronon's, he shifted John's weight but didn't turn his back on the Kamma Ket.

"A team will be in contact," Teyla said shortly, nodding for Evan and Ronon to leave the room while she stood guard.

Evan made it out into the tunnel, shifting John again as he started the slow climb up hill. He could keep a descent pace for a while, probably all the way back to Atlantis.

"Lorne to Reed," Evan said into his radio.

"Reed here," he immediately responded.

"Have the forerunner alert Atlantis that we have two injured, some kind of technology induced brain trauma. Our ETA is twenty five minutes. Get everyone else back to the 'gate," Evan instructed firmly. The walking estimate was tight even under normal circumstances, carrying John and Rodney should have slowed them down, but he could see that they would be quicker than anyone thought possible. Medical treatment sooner rather than later might be able to reverse whatever damage had been done, if that was even possible.

Teyla caught up with them, still glowering back toward the chamber. "They will not follow."

"Good," Evan mumbled. It wasn't much but it would make their journey back to the 'gate easier if they weren't watching over their shoulders every step of the way.

Rodney gave a short moan from over Ronon's shoulders, one of his arms flailing free from Ronon's grasp.

"We're safe," Coughlin said, suddenly at Ronon's side and holding onto Rodney's hand without disrupting their quick pace.

Rodney whimpered and tried to pull away from Coughlin but settled as Coughlin stroked the skin on the back of his hand.

"What? It works for my little sister," Coughlin said defensively when he noticed Evan watching them.

Evan just nodded, holding John even closer as he stepped through the false cave wall that still covered the front entrance. The sun had yet to fully appear over the horizon even though light had started to filter across the sky. He looked out over the small valley, the forest obscuring the way to the 'gate, and discovered that five of the marines were waiting where the forest gave away to the slope of the mountain.

They made their way down the short slope, Evan thinking that this wasn't that much different from helping David limp up the mountain the night before, waiting for the sound of a Dart flying overhead or a Wraith soldier creeping behind the rocks. Except David had been moving and talking; John hadn't made a sound or movement even though Evan knew from experience how uncomfortable it was to be carried over someone's shoulders.

"I thought I told you to go back to the 'gate," Evan told Reed as soon as they reached him and the four marines.

"I left David with Jones and Gale. I figured that he couldn't get too far away from them hopping," Reed said as he tried to smile. He gave up as he looked at John and Rodney. "How are they?"

Evan just shook his head, swallowing as his throat tried to close up.

"They did something to their brains," Coughlin said. He was still hurrying alongside of Ronon, keeping Rodney calm and holding onto his hand.

There was nothing Evan could say to the look of horror and revulsion on Reed's face, so he didn't. The walk through the forest and back to the 'gate went more quickly than even Evan had imagined, though he knew that he'd remember every minute that he carried John's limp body, and he was distantly pleased that the marines automatically formed a defensive perimeter around them.

They reached the 'gate in seventeen minutes, Reed dialing and sending his GDO through before they walked through the event horizon, the sun climbing rapidly in the sky at their backs. Evan didn't stop and look back at the world they were leaving; he didn't care if he ever saw the Kamma Ket and their mountain again, even if they claimed to have something that would help John and Rodney. They had been trying to help the first time, Evan didn't believe they'd been lying about that, but it meant he wasn't about to let them try to fix whatever they'd done.

On Atlantis they were immediately swarmed by medical personnel and Evan carefully set John down on the gurney, aware of Ronon doing the same with Rodney. As he watched them being rushed away, Dr. Beckett calling orders as he examined John, Evan found himself wishing that he'd taken the time to wipe John's face again before they came through the 'gate.

"Major Lorne, Teyla," Elizabeth Weir said as she hurried up to them. "If you have a moment to do a quick debrief and then I'll let you join your teams in the infirmary."

Evan followed her up the stairs, rolling his shoulders as his body reminded him that he'd just carried a grown man through a forest. He barely heard what Elizabeth asked them, filling in a blank here and there when a question was directed toward him. It could have been five minutes or an hour later when she released them, Evan wasn't able to tell, and he found Teyla at his side as they entered the transporter that would take them to the infirmary.

"They will be well. John is stronger than most I've met, and Rodney is more resourceful than we give him credit for," Teyla said, turning to look at Evan. "Doctor Beckett has fixed many injuries, brought them both back from the edge of death more times than I had thought possible. If there is anyone who can help them it is him."

"Yes," Evan said, more for Teyla's benefit than his own. He knew very well what Beckett could and couldn't do, and fix brain damage was on the list of things that was improbable at the very best. Considering they didn't have the slightest idea what the machine had done to begin with, it was all Evan could do to hope that the damage had been superficial and temporary. If the machine really had done something to their brains it would be difficult for even the medical equipment on Atlantis to detect, let alone fix.

They reached the infirmary and Evan wasn't the slightest bit surprised to see that it was in a state of carefully organized chaos. Most of the doctors and nurses were busy at the end of room that held the more heavy equipment, directions being given and quickly followed as the medical staff moved around each other with choreography that almost looked practiced. A handful of beds had personnel from Atlantis in them, most in stages of recovery from various accidents and ailments. Teyla joined Ronon where he was leaning against the wall, out of the way but where he could see everything that was happening. It was clear that there was no one free to tell them what was happening, or if they even knew anything yet.

Evan spotted Reed and Coughlin gathered at the edge of one of the infirmary beds and he walked over, slightly relieved to find David sitting in the bed with his ankle propped up.

"How are they?" David asked immediately, leaning forward in his bed as if he could see past the curtain and the chaos.

Evan shook his head. "No word yet. They'll tell us when they know. How's your ankle doing?"

"Fine," David said impatiently. "What happened? What did they do to them?"

Evan shook his head again, not failing to notice how Coughlin looked away and how Reed scowled. "They weren't even sure. They said they didn't intend to hurt them."

"Right," Coughlin said roughly, running one of his hands through his hair.

Not willing to discuss intention, not while they were standing there waiting to find out if John and Rodney would actually recover, Evan leaned against the infirmary wall. He couldn't see what the medical staff was doing, but he could hear and that was enough. He'd waited around in enough hospitals and emergency rooms to know what it sounded like when someone was dying.

Reed sat down on the end of David's bed, his hand resting on the leg above David's injured ankle, and Coughlin took up position against the wall on the other side of the bed. They couldn't be out there with John and Rodney, and from the way Teyla and Ronon were staring across the infirmary they weren't in a space for company outside of each other, but they could wait together as a team. David's hand slipped up and Evan found himself holding it, drawing strength from the silent support of the team.

*****

Rodney regained consciousness first, three full days after they returned from the planet. As soon as Dr. Beckett cleared him to receive visitors, Evan found himself at the edge of Rodney's beside along with the rest of his team and Ronon and Teyla. Throughout the three days Rodney had been shifting and occasionally making noises, Beckett had eventually put pillows and blankets against the side rails on the bed so Rodney couldn't hurt himself or tumble free, but John hadn't moved except for the slow in and out of his breathing since they'd found him.

"Where's John?" Rodney demanded, already sitting with his feet hanging out of the bed and fussing with his IV line.

"John has not yet awoken," Teyla said quietly. "Did Dr. Beckett not tell you?"

"He did, but where is he?" Rodney insisted, looking ready to climb out of the bed to go find himself if he didn't get the answer he was looking for.

Evan pulled the curtains that separated Rodney and John's bed aside. The area in between the beds had a few chairs stacked to the side and more than once when Evan came down after his shift he would find someone else on his or John's team already sitting with them.

Rodney stared across the small space and his expression crumpled briefly before he looked away. "I tried to pull him out of the circle but it was like stepping into..." he trailed off, frustrated as he waved one of his hands.

"You did what you could," Ronon said simply, clapping his hand on Rodney's shoulder. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I've told Beckett and every single nurse that pokes their head in to run more tests, I feel fine. A little disoriented, but fine. I can still calculate pi and I think I've come up with a solution to the power generation problem we've been having on the north pier," Rodney said, his eyes losing focus for a moment as he thought. "Beckett says he can't find anything wrong, though I have another appointment with a CT scanner later."

"That's good. Really good," Coughlin said with a solemn nod.

Evan nodded, because maybe that meant John would wake up soon and be just fine, and maybe a little bit more rested than usual.

"Do you feel any less, burdened?" David asked curiously, shifting uncomfortably on his crutches.

Rodney rolled his eyes. "No, I don't; though the only thing I was particularly burdened with before was my superior intellect, and that seems to be fully intact."

Evan couldn't stop the smile that formed and Rodney's words, catching grins and eye rolls swiftly passing between his teammates and John's team. "Good to know."

"Alright, since you're all here, if someone would go get my primary laptop from my quarters, my tablet from the pack I took off-world, and the external hard drive from my desk in the main lab. Oh, and a cup of coffee, and maybe something to eat. It's got to be near some meal time in the mess hall, right?" Rodney asked, looking around at all of them hopefully.

"After your scans, Rodney. I told you you had fifteen minutes to check in with your team before the scanner was ready," Beckett said as he joined the crowded area.

Rodney rolled his eyes. "I feel fine, my brain is as excellent as ever, and I actually have important things to do. Who knows what the lab looks like after I've been gone for four days."

"We will see you for dinner," Teyla said, pausing to bring Rodney in so their foreheads were nearly touching.

Rodney bowed his own head and rested his hand on Teyla's shoulder. "Oh, pudding cups. Pudding cups would be good," he said as soon as Teyla released him.

Evan guided his team out of the curtained off area, David hobbling away on his crutches while Reed and Coughlin both disappeared rather quickly. Ronon and Teyla stayed a moment longer and Evan took the opportunity to pull the curtains back in place and step into the small area that surrounded John. He took John's hand, the one that didn't have tubes taped to the back of it, and looked down.

There were things he wanted to say, a lot of things, but he'd stood at too many bedsides and said his goodbyes to people who never had a chance, and made promises to people who never woke up. He knew that talking to coma patients was supposed to be good, that they were supposed to be able to hear what they were being told and come back. But John wasn't exactly in a coma, not as far as Beckett's scans could tell, and he knew that David was here every evening to tell John about the greenhouses in a one-sided conversation that continued after brief pauses where John should have said something. Evan guessed that David was waiting for John to answer one of his questions or comment on the new shrub that they got from P4C-284, and didn't have the heart to tell David to stop. And if it was true that talking was reaching John, maybe all the plant talk would encourage John to wake up just so he could hear about something else.

Finally, Evan just squeezed John's hand and resettled it on the bed. He took a moment to ruffle John's hair so it fell just like John liked to wear it, and slipped out of the infirmary to the sound of Rodney's complaints about the scanner.

He passed Coughlin in the hall, noting that the man was carrying a laptop and three pudding cups, and decided that he could go rummage through John and Rodney's packs where they'd been left in their cubbies and find Rodney's tablet. After all, Rodney hadn't been in the circle when they'd started to do whatever it is the Kamma Ket had done, and he could have just called for help and ran. Anyone who would walk into a circle of obvious doom to try and get John out could be catered to for a little while.

*****

"Parrish to Lorne. Major Lorne, come in," David's voice came out of the radio that Evan had left on his desk.

Evan moaned and tipped his head back, blinking at the computer screen as it came into focus. He was pretty sure he'd actually been dreaming in spreadsheets; all of the columns wouldn't add up right and the formulas didn't make any sense. Evan blinked as he tried to think what had happened next, because he had the vaguest memory of Diwyn saying that he'd only give John back if Evan could make the monthly munitions table balance.

"Evan? Are you there?" David asked, the radio clicking as he messed with the dials on his end.

"I'm here, what's wrong?" Evan asked as he managed to focus his eyes on his watch to see that it was two in the morning. Things always had to go wrong at two in the morning, and if it was another plant that had tentacles and more sentience than David had thought when he first brought it back, Evan was going to something drastic.

"Nothing, everything is fine. Actually, better than fine, I think. Can you come down to the infirmary?" David asked, sounding perfectly awake.

Evan immediately got to his feet, shut the lid to his laptop and left his office. "I'll be right there."

Atlantis was quiet in the middle of the night. There were a few lights on in the labs he passed, a scientist here or there deeply involved with their research, and he passed one marine on patrol, but other than that the hallways were empty and the lights dimmed. The nurse on duty was in the back office and Evan slipped into the infirmary without alerting anyone. They weren't strict about visiting hours as long as no one was disturbed and they often had parts of teams camping out while they waited for news on their teammates.

Inside the curtain surrounding John's bed, Evan found David sitting in a chair with his foot propped up on the bed railing and a thick book open in his lap. David had been off crutches for two days - John had been unconscious for just over a week now - but was still limping a little and less than enthusiastic about doing any amount of walking.

"Evan, you look like crap," David said as he looked up from the book.

Choosing not to respond, Evan ran a hand over where his hair was undoubtably sticking up from falling asleep on his desk, and looked at John. John was as still and quiet as he had been every time Evan had checked on him. "What's going on?"

"No, seriously. Have you been sleeping at all?" David asked, swinging his foot down and staring at Evan.

"David," Evan said shortly. He didn't like to order David around, he didn't even really like to order Reed and Coughlin around even though they were very good about doing what he asked without him having to make it an order, but he was at the end of his patience for the night and for the week.

David flipped his book closed and stood up, favoring his strong ankle as he leaned against John's bed. "Alright, alright. I didn't want to bother the doctors in case it wasn't anything. But watch him."

They stood in silence for a few minutes, Evan's gaze not wavering from John. "What?" he finally asked.

"Wait, just a moment," David said, licking his lower lip. "There! Did you see it?"

Evan blinked, not sure what he was supposed to be seeing until he saw it. John's fingers in his left hand twitched, the carpals in the back of his hand moving ever so slightly. He swallowed hard, not knowing if this was really a good thing or not. Coma patients could sometimes make little movements by themselves, but John wasn't exactly in a coma. Rodney had been moving and making noise since the beginning, so maybe John was starting that stage of whatever was happening to him.

John's head rolled to the side, his chin falling down near his left shoulder, and Evan gave a small sigh of relief as John shifted in that direction ever so slightly. John always slept on his left side with his head burrowing down until he was off his pillow completely. Just that slight movement made John appear so much more natural and John-like than he had been while lying on his back.

"See, it's something, isn't it?" David asked hopefully, watching as John's hand moved again, this time dragging his fingers nearly closed in an approximation of a fist.

"Yeah, it is," Evan agreed. He moved closer the bed and touched his fingers to the underside of John's fingers. He pressed slightly and felt John's press back before wrapping his fingers around Evan's, holding them there.

David sat back down in the chair, flipping through his book as he settled back in.

"You've been here every night?" Evan asked quietly.

David shrugged. "A few. When Teyla and Ronon aren't here, and Rodney was here earlier but he looked like he really needed to be away from the infirmary for more than a few hours at a time. Besides, I get caught up on my reading and John gets to learn about all sorts of things."

Evan glanced at John, smiling a little as John's head slipped further down the pillow, and decided not to tell David that John probably hadn't processed a word he'd said. "Thank you," he finally said.

"Well, you apparently weren't going to let yourself, so someone had to. You and John really need to work on that, you know. When you were in here three months ago getting the shrapnel out of your chest, John couldn't even bring himself to come in the infirmary until you were conscious. He just stood out in the hallway and paced until Ronon dragged him off to run on one of the piers," David said as he turned a page.

Evan nodded, because that sounded like something John would do even though he had been so strung out at the time that he had no idea if John had been there or not. John wasn't good with the infirmary or doctors in general, Evan had noticed that before they'd even had dinner together for the first time. Evan wasn't fond of them himself, though he managed, but when John was in the infirmary all the command responsibilities fell to him.

He'd always known that being involved with his CO was a bad idea, everyone knew that, but in the end what was a good or bad idea hadn't mattered. There was something about living everyday knowing that your next moment could be spent getting eaten by aliens that made it easy to see what mattered, and John had quickly become what mattered; not regulations or common sense. It didn't mean they couldn't live without each other, they knew the risks of getting involved and feeling something for another person while living in a war zone, but it did mean that it was hard to not compartmentalize when one of them was badly hurt. They had to put Atlantis first, even when that precluded them from sitting by the bedside of their injured partner.

John made a small sound, a cross between a moan and a grunt, and David looked up again.

"Next thing you know he'll be talking in full sentences and demanding coffee and computers," David said with a smile.

"I think you have John confused with McKay," Evan said, not looking up from John.

"Are you going to go get some actual sleep, in a bed not at your desk, or are you going to stay for a while?" David asked.

Evan glanced at his watch and decided that he could sleep just as well in a chair in the infirmary as he could at his desk. He'd be up and out by six, finish up reports and be ready to be in the eight o'clock briefings as both himself and John. "I'll stay. Go sleep before you fall asleep in the greenhouse and a plant eats you while you're napping."

David closed his book and stood up. "I assure you that my plants are far too well behaved to snack on anyone I haven't designated as plant food. Besides, they love me too much to eat me."

The scary thing was that Evan had seen some of David's plants, and was pretty sure that they did love him. "Goodnight, David."

"Goodnight Evan, goodnight John," David said before limping out of the curtains.

John made another sound, almost like the sounds he made when he fell asleep without Evan realizing it, and Evan would ask him a question and John would respond with a noise like he was trying to answer.

Evan used his free hand to pull the chair closer to the bed and sat down. John was still holding onto his right hand, not too tightly but enough that Evan could feel the intent in John's grasp. He watched John for a while, adjusting his pillow so that it was closer to the way he liked to sleep, and eventually he let his head rest against the side of his bed and his eyes slip shut.

*****

"Evan, what are you doing?" John asked.

Evan slowly woke up, feeling John's hand on his shoulder and wondering why that was so important. His neck was aching and he shifted to try and roll over when he realized that he was in a chair. Everything quickly fell into place and he sat up suddenly and stared at John. "You're awake. You're okay."

John ran a hand over his face, not shaving for just over a week had left him a little scruffy, and gave a half shrug. "I feel fine," he said, interrupting himself with a long yawn. "A little tired, but fine."

Blinking hard and feeling more than a little overwhelmed with relief, Evan leaned back in the chair. "Just like that?" Evan asked.

John nodded. "I guess so. How long have I been out? Where's Rodney?"

"Eight days," Evan said, he reached forward and let John take his hand. "Rodney woke up a few days ago. He's fine."

"Not bad," John said, leaning back against the bed and blinked. "I didn't almost ascend or anything like that?"

Shaking his head, Evan squeezed John's hand slightly and smiled when John squeezed back. "Nope. No glowing, no lights, no apparitions."

"Good. The last thing Atlantis needs is me and McKay floating around here sticking our noses into everything," John said with a shrug as he released Evan's hand and started to pull at the tape holding the IV in his hand.

"I'm pretty sure the Ancients would have kicked both of you out within a week and set you down naked on some planet," Evan pointed out, relaxing as John mock grimaced.

"Running around naked on a pre-industrial planet with McKay. I think you've just given me nightmares for the rest of my life." John shuddered theatrically.

"It's not like you haven't done that before," Evan said. Just about every team wound up stranded without their clothes at some point in the course of going off-world. Sometimes it was during the process of being taken captive, or acidic mud and rain, or using clothes to barter back one of your teammates. Evan had personally seen more of his team than he'd ever wanted to and considering the amount of trouble John's team got into off-world he would have been shocked if John's team hadn't encountered similar situations.

John shrugged. "True. But that doesn't mean I want to think about it. As far as my team is concerned that mission never happened."

Evan laughed; it was the first time in the past week that his chest hadn't felt too constricted to laugh and he squeezed John's hand again. He wanted to lean in, wrap his arms around John and not be separated by the rail of the hospital bed, but it was just as likely that a doctor or nurse could come by any minute. Their relationship wasn't a secret, though they tried to be discrete and he could wait until John had been released.

"I'll go grab the on-duty nurse. Maybe you'll get lucky and get out of here by lunch," Evan said.

"As long as it isn't in time to make any meeting scheduled for today, that's fine with me," John said with a sly smile.

Evan rolled his eyes and went to leave, pausing briefly as he exited the curtains to look back and check that John was actually conscious and talking and smiling, and it wasn't just some sleep deprived hallucination he'd been having. John had propped himself up and was working at the edge of the tape on his hand again, reaching up absentmindedly to scratch at the growth of his beard. Smiling, Evan turned around and nearly bumped into Dr. Beckett.

"John's awake," Evan said without preamble, not missing the the quickly concealed expression of relief from Beckett.

"That's good to hear. He's cognizant?" Beckett asked.

"Yep, says he feels fine," Evan couldn't help but continuing to smile.

Beckett nodded. "Well, he says that after being shot, so we'll see. If you'll give my regrets to Dr. Weir for missing the staff meeting this morning, I'll see if I can get the good Colonel out of here before he starts hatching an escape plan. If you'll excuse me?"

The reminder of the meeting he wasn't exactly ready for didn't dim Evan's enthusiasm, but he dashed off anyway. He needed to find John's team and radio the rest of his own team before the meeting started, though he figured that the meeting might get delayed because Rodney at least would be down in the infirmary to see John for himself.

An hour later as he settled into the conference room, unable to miss the relief emanating from everyone gathered even as Rodney argued with one of the other scientists about the feasibility of his addition to the low level power generators on the piers, Evan leaned back and tried to relax. John was conscious and as well as he had been before the whole fiasco with the Kamma Ket. There wasn't any need for the tightness lingering in Evan's body, but the relief that he'd felt earlier was almost washed out by a fear that he couldn't name.

Writing it off as being exhausted and stressed, Evan figured he'd feel better after John was released from the infirmary and everything was back to normal. Or, as normal as things ever were in a floating city in a distant galaxy. Maybe there was something to the science fiction movies Reed kept bringing to the joint team movie nights, despite the way Rodney picked the movies apart with John and Coughlin sometimes joining in. Deciding that he needed to schedule a movie night soon, Evan leaned back and watched the scientists duke it out, because apparently physics was a spectator sport. Evan smiled to himself, figuring out the rules so that he could explain the game to John over lunch; and with that thought almost everything settled in his mind and Evan let himself relax again.

*****


	3. Chapter 3

John walked through the halls of Atlantis; showered, clean-shaven, and in a fresh uniform. He nodded at the people he passed, marines and airmen straightening and saluting when they saw him, and scientists smiling enthusiastically. It was the part of his job he was least comfortable with, being in the spotlight and having everyone notice and rely on him. He'd never been responsible for much of anything in his life, even in the Air Force they seemed to realize that he wasn't a leader and shouldn't be placed in command positions. John was a pilot, an artist in the sky, solo, solitary, and only accountable to himself - and to the Air Force - when he nearly killed himself on a mission.

Atlantis had changed all that. He'd gone from being the guy everyone except his squadron avoided to the man who was responsible for every single person in the city. And somehow, it had worked out. The marines, after a couple of near disasters during their first six months, looked up to him and followed his orders without any sign of mutiny. The scientists knew that John would listen to them, and more importantly that he would always send rescue teams if they were stranded off-world. And his team, and now Evan's, were family like he'd never thought possible. In some ways it felt good, but as he nodded to another scientist he mostly felt a little uneasy with the acknowledgements.

After quizzing him as to what he remembered about the Kamma Ket, which was mostly being bored and hungry right up to the point where he'd been in a strange type of pain that he hadn't been able to describe, and putting him through two separate scanners, Beckett had released him with a warning to come back as soon as he felt anything odd. And then had gone on to elaborate that that meant immediately, not a few hours later when he was about to pass out. John had eventually gotten away with the promise and a reminder that Evan wouldn't let him pass out.

He'd already seen the rest of his team, and had sternly told Rodney that the next time he told him to call for help and run he meant it. Rodney had assured him that it had been a side-effect of the weird alien circle and not to expect anything similar to happen in the future. John had let Rodney keep his delusions of not caring and watched him dash from the infirmary to get to the morning staff meeting. Ronon had promised to teach him better moves, and John didn't bother to try and explain that he had stepped into the circle of his own volition, and Teyla had merely grasped his shoulders and told him how glad she was that he and Rodney were both well.

The mess hall was just starting to clear out from the lunch rush when he arrived and John got a tray heaped with lunch-time food even though he was still craving waffles. Waffles with thick maple syrup, and butter. John licked his lips and found an out of the way table, content to eat the Athosian potatoes and some kind of stew that combined foods from several worlds. It wasn't the same as eating on Earth, not by a long shot, but it beat most of the reconstituted and packaged food the Daedalus supplied them with any day.

"They let you out already! It took them nearly a whole day before they released me," Rodney said indignantly as he set his laptop down on the table across from John.

"Nice to see you too, Rodney," John said, digging into the stew enthusiastically. The last thing he could remember eating was lasagna from an MRE, and that should be no one's last meal.

"Oh, they did biscuits," Rodney said, immediately distracted as he disappeared over to the food counters.

"Glad to see you could make it," Evan added as he set down his tablet next to John. "Beckett cleared you or are you hiding in plain sight?"

John rolled his eyes and waved his fork to indicate that he was actually a free man. Remarkably, Evan seemed to understand his vague gesture and just nodded.

"Save me a seat. And, really, you should have just stayed out for another day. That meeting went on forever," Evan grinned and walked in the direction of the food.

John swallowed his bite of food, half ready to ask why he needed to save Evan a seat when he saw all of Evan's team along with Teyla and Ronon heading in his direction. Reed and Coughlin put their trays on one of the neighboring tables and dragged it so that it was bumped up against the one John was sitting at, and everyone quickly arranged themselves.

By the time Evan and Rodney made it back, Evan's team was having a very loud discussion on a topic that John couldn't even make a guess at because they were all talking over each other.

"How do you take them off-world?" John asked quietly as Evan sat down next to him.

Evan smiled fondly. "Only because you make me."

John gave a startled laugh, catching everyone's attention. Fortunately, before John had to try to explain, David came to the rescue.

"Here, I thought you might want to finish it. I put a bookmark where we left off," David said as he held a thick book out to John.

When John looked to Evan for an explanation, and didn't receive any help on that front, John accept the book and read the title: _The New Xenobiology Compendium_. "Thank you," John said, setting the book on his lap for lack of anything else to do with it.

"You seemed really interested in the article on the unique _Dipsacus fullonum_ from P3X-173," David added before he returned to his discussion with Reed and Coughlin, somehow managing to drag the rest of John's team into the argument.

"David was reading it to you while you were unconscious. I think he mistook the lack of constant interruption for interest," Evan explained.

John nodded. "Well, if I unexpectedly start knowing things about plants, we know who to blame."

"Don't tell Rodney, but sometimes you talk about math in your sleep," Evan whispered, grinning when John looked up.

John laughed again, this time not catching the attention of their teams. "Was I reciting pi while I was unconscious?"

Evan shook his head. "No, but assuming you're back to work tomorrow, I have something new we can try out."

His grin grew bigger as he leaned in and listened to Evan's explanation of what he'd termed 'Physics Boxing', something John was going to have to rename at a later date. John finished the rest of his meal surrounded by his and Evan's teams and wondered how this was all even possible. There was nothing he could think of that could make that moment better, except for maybe waffles and maple syrup.

*****

The rest of the day passed quickly enough as John got settled back in. He spent a few hours catching up on the state of the city with Elizabeth, another two hours going through his email and sending a list to Evan to see what he'd already taken care of, and the rest of his time was spent writing up a mission report. He remembered everything pretty clearly, which was unusual for reports that he wrote after spending a significant amount of time in the infirmary. After making a note about what the circle looked like so that he could add it to the 'dangerous things in the Pegasus Galaxy' section they had on the internal servers, John closed up his laptop and headed toward Evan's quarters.

They were really both his and Evan's quarters, but they had been Evan's quarters first and John still had a bed and a contingency bag in the quarters that were marked as his on the map. He didn't mind switching, and not just because Evan's room had a balcony; Evan hadn't wanted to move away from his team and John had understood that. Both Teyla and Ronon had rooms that were a little more isolated; Teyla's was at the edge of the section where they roomed people that came back with them to Atlantis, and Ronon was out toward one of the piers. Rodney had moved quarters a few days after John had, grumbling the entire time that he needed a room that was closer to the lab and the transporter, and John had pretended not to notice that Rodney's new quarters were two doors down from Evan's.

Evan was already there when he arrived, in the shower from the sound of things, and John kicked off his boots and shrugged out of his jacket and pants before settling in on the bed. Pretty much everything was just as he remembered it, though the laundry hamper was starting to overflow just a little and there was a small collection of mugs on the desk.

"Did you even sleep in here?" John asked when Evan came out of the bathroom in just his boxers.

It took Evan a moment to process the question, his eyes focusing where John had pulled back the blankets and was sprawled out on the bed. "Uh, a little. Mostly at my desk, I think."

John frowned as saw the dark circles under Evan's eyes, though he couldn't really say anything about it. It had to have been hell for Evan to have to wait helplessly and not know if he was going to wake up; helpless was not something that either of them did particularly well. "Come to bed. If you're going to stay awake through tomorrow's follow up meeting, you should sleep now."

Evan glanced over to where he'd left his laptop before climbing into bed.

Thinking at Atlantis, John dimmed the lights but left the windows transparent so they could see the ocean from the bed. After a moment he found Evan wrapped around him, his arms tight and body tense. John held Evan just as close, thinking that it had been more than a few weeks since they'd stopped for more than a quick kiss or falling asleep against each other in bed. He grimaced as he suddenly recalled waiting for Evan and David to reach the cave while the Wraith were still out in the forest, his arms tightening around Evan until they were both practically clinging to each other.

It took what felt like a long time before Evan relaxed his grip and John followed suit, letting Evan find his own place on the bed even though his hands were still touching John.

"Sorry about that, it's just been a long week," Evan said quietly.

John nodded, knowing that Evan could feel it through the pillow they had wound up sharing while they laid close together. "I'm right here now," he offered as a reassurance.

Evan nodded, the pillow shifting with the movement. "I know."

A few minutes later, Evan's breathing settled into a steady rhythm and John let his hand rest on Evan's side. He was somehow still tired even after spending a week unaware of anything. The missing time would have been a little odd if it wasn't something he was getting used to, and not just from the occasional time dilation field or wormhole distortion. The infirmary tended to suck time away, either through use of the really good drugs when feeling was not something that was wise or simply by being unconscious due to injury or technological influence. In fact, the only thing that really felt odd about the whole situation was that he wasn't hurting anywhere that wasn't usual. There was always a dull ache in a few spots where he'd been shot and an old injury in his ankle from a chopper crash, but other than that he felt as good as he ever did.

John felt himself slipping into sleep and finally let his eyes closed as he rolled over and pushed the pillow away so he could rest.

*****

It was dark, dark enough that John couldn't make anything out as he slowly looked around. He was crouched on the floor, his hands pressing against the smooth, cold surface. When he shifted, something brushed against the back of his head and he suppressed a surprised yelp. He reached up cautiously with one hand and latched onto whatever it was, his fingers getting lost in the fabric. When he figured that it wasn't dangerous, and more importantly that it wasn't moving by itself, John used both of his hands to explore. The floor was hard against his bare knees and he gasped when he knelt on something sharp. His hand came away wet when he reached down to touch his knee and he could smell the coppery scent of blood filling the small space.

The door opened, light flooding in and he reached up to shield his eyes. The still wet blood on his hand caught his attention and he stared at it, the scent flooding his nose and mouth.

"John, come on. I found you. You have to help me find everyone else."

John looked up from his hands and he stared at the boy standing in front of him, starting with the shoes with one set of laces undone and going all the way up to his folded arms and impatient frown.

"You're it. I found you. That's the way the game works," the boy insisted. "Everyone else is still hiding."

John looked back down, realizing that he was in a hall closet of some kind, with jackets and coats hanging above him. The floor was varnished wood, slick under his hands, and there was a half circle metal inlay. John touched it with his clean hand, realizing that's what he'd cut his knee on. He looked up again and tried to say that he was hurt. That he was bleeding and needed something to clean up with. His mouth moved, he could feel his lips opening and closing and his tongue bumping against his teeth, but no sound came out.

"Fine. If you're not coming I'll find them myself. Freak," the boy said. He closed the door with a slam, the sound seeming to echo.

Blinking, John adjusted to the dark again and tried to remember what he was supposed to say. He raised his hand to his mouth, willing words to come out as he tried to speak but instead he just tasted the bitterness from the blood still on his hand.

After some time had passed, in the dark and the quiet, John tentatively raised his hand to where he had seen the handle. He wrapped his fingers around the cool metal, the edges of the pattern inscribed on the surface pressing into his skin, and waited. The door wouldn't open by itself, not unless someone came to find him again, but John didn't try to press down on the handle to see if it would turn. Eventually he let it go and crouched down on the floor again. He traced the metal inlay in the floor, careful not to let the metal cut his fingertips, and made it all the way to the back of the closet. He shifted himself until he was hidden completely by the long winter coat at the side. The inside of the coat was soft like fur and John pressed his face into it, careful to keep his bloody knee and hand away from the fabric. Letting his eyes close, John waited and listened. One of the boys would come for him soon, after everyone else had been found. And even if they didn't, his brother would come get him when it was time to go home. It was better like this, in the quiet where he didn't say the wrong things and get stared at.

*****

John's eyes shot open and he found himself taking an unsteady breath. He could feel sweat breaking out on his chest and arms and already dripping down his back and soaking the shirt he was wearing. Nightmares were part of the job description; both he and Evan woke fairly regularly from them and John had seen all the members of his team wake when they were off-world with their eyes wide and a hand brushing away sweat from above their eyes.

Of course, John usually dreamed of Wraith invasion and hive ships, or the Genii underground prisons and Kolya. On very rare occasions there were clowns. Dreams about hanging around in a closet with a bunch of coats weren't exactly on the list of things that made him break out in a cold sweat, except for he was looking at evidence that it did. After waiting a moment as he tried to place what about the dream had unsettled him so much, even though he didn't remember feeling afraid in the dream, John swung his feet out of bed and made his way into the bathroom. He made sure the door was closed before thinking the lights on, just enough that he could see but not bright enough that he would wake all the way up, and pulled his shirt off.

He spend a few moments washing up, eventually stepping out of his boxers because the waistband was also damp with perspiration. As he turned to go back to bed, he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror; he was the same as he'd always been, even though his hair was a little more plastered down than usual. He took an extra moment to run his hands through it, encouraging his cowlicks back to their usual enthusiasm for defying gravity. On impulse he reached down and checked his knee; no blood or broken skin, though when he touched it and remembered what he'd cut it on his dream his mind sparked. The circle was the same one he'd stepped into in the Kamma Ket cavern. Source of the nightmare identified, even though it still didn't make any sense, John gathered up his clothes and tossed them into the direction of the laundry hamper as he turned off the lights and exited the bathroom.

"You okay?" Evan asked, his eyes half open and his voice rough with sleep as John climbed back into bed.

"Yeah, fine," John said, grabbing the blankets from where he'd kicked them off in the night. The air of the room now felt uncomfortably cool on his bare and still slightly damp skin, and John brought the blanket up to his shoulders. He jolted a little as the fabric brushed against his chin, an unwelcome reminder of the fabric of the coat pressing against his face.

Evan moved closer, dropping a hand over John's chest and settling them both together. "You sure? We can talk."

John rolled his eyes a little as he settled his back against Evan's chest. Talking was Evan's thing more than it was his, but that didn't stop Evan from asking even if it was obscenely early in the morning and Evan probably hadn't gotten much sleep over the past week. John waited to see if Evan would drop back off without an answer, the need to sleep hopefully more pressing than anything else.

"John?" Evan prompted after a few minutes.

"Just a dream. The Kamma Ket," John supplied, hoping that it was enough for Evan to drop the subject.

Evan's arm tightened around John. "Crazy bastards," he mumbled. "I don't think I've ever seen Teyla that pissed off before."

John smiled sleepily as he let the warmth from Evan pull him back towards sleep. "You should see her in hand to hand combat against the Wraith. I almost feel bad for the Wraith."

"Almost?" Evan teased. His arm tightened briefly again and he leaned forward to place his lips briefly against the back of John's neck. A few minutes later Evan shifted and John felt him fall back asleep, apparently reassured that John was alright.

John closed his eyes and burrowed his head down, making sure to push the blanket far enough down that it wouldn't brush against his face. As tired as he was, sleep evaded him and he wound up watching the sun rise over the waters surrounding Atlantis. He didn't mind so much, grateful to feel Evan pressed against him, but the memory of trying to speak and having nothing come out stayed with him. He eventually drifted off with his fingers pressed up against his lips, trying to remember what he had needed to say.

*****

It took about two days before John was caught up with everything again, his gratitude for Evan increasing as he discovered how much he'd taken care of in John's absence. In their first year, when they'd had no contact or support from Earth, if John had been out for a week it would have taken him close to a month to get a handle on everything that had happened. As it was there was an organized file in his email when he got out of a staff meeting with everything that he needed to sign off on and a handful of things he needed to address himself. John had immediately broken his and Evan's mutual rule about discretion and kissed Evan soundly as soon as his office door was closed. To his relief, Evan had just laughed and said that John owed him more than just kisses and coffee.

John looked down at the off-world roster that he was finishing up on his tablet. Before the fiasco with the Kamma Ket, John's team had been scheduled to go off-world to one of the traveling markets that appeared on various planets in the Pegasus galaxy from time to time. It was a good place to see what populations were technologically advanced enough to be useful in the fight against the Wraith, to start alliances, make trades, and get a handle on how the 'gate-faring population of the galaxy was managing as a whole.

The resurgence of the Wraith had left many worlds devastated and had forced many cultures to band together just so they could survive. It didn't take the Wraith to leave the rest of a decimated population of a village to starve or to start smaller wars between people looking for a safe place after their world had been rendered uninhabitable. There were those who said that humans were just food to the Wraith, that it was survival instinct that led the Wraith to feed and kill. After seeing the way the Wraith destroyed a population when they had no further use for them or if they were considered a threat, and then left the survivors to suffer instead of consuming them, John disagreed. Humans weren't just food to the Wraith, they were prey that could be toyed with and used for their amusement; Ronon was living proof of that. Despite their efforts, it wasn't enough to just make it so the Wraith couldn't feed; there was nothing but complete destruction that would stop them.

Getting to his feet, thoughts of the Wraith having left him grim, John left his office and walked toward Rodney's lab. He might be ready to go off-world but he needed to make sure Rodney had everything with his scientists squared away. And, he needed to check that Rodney wasn't sufficiently freaked out enough that he wanted off the team. It hadn't happened yet, and John doubted that it would, but he'd spend the first three months waiting for Rodney to say he'd had enough. There were plenty of complaints, mostly about how much walking they did, but Rodney seemed about as unfazed by going off-world as anyone he'd ever met. Still, he had to check, because something about the situation with the Kamma Ket had unsettled him. If he was unsettled by something, Rodney was usually pretty freaked out about it as well.

The labs were actually quiet when he went inside, which was unusual enough that John did a swift check to make sure everyone was there and hadn't been evacuated due to a project going wrong. But everyone he recognized as belonging in that work space was there, busy on laptops or with parts of things spread out all over their workspaces. John took the time to walk around and look at some of the projects, nodding his tacit approval even though he only had a vague idea of what some of them were doing.

He found Rodney in his office, which was really just a medium sized work space off the side of the main lab where Rodney could keep half an eye on everyone while he worked. Rodney was facing away from the lab, had three laptops surrounding him and was typing rapidly on the keyboard of one while he kept glancing at the screens of the other two. John waited a while, knowing better to interrupt Rodney while he was deep in the middle of a thought.

Rodney turned suddenly, reaching for the tablet on his desk but freezing for a moment when he saw John standing in the doorway. He took a minute before he exhaled and pressed the palm of his hand to his chest. "Would you mind saying something next time? The last thing Atlantis needs is to lose me to a senseless heart attack."

John smiled even though it wasn't really funny. "Sorry. Didn't want to interrupt your process," he said as he waved his hand at the computer screen.

"Well, you already have, so what do you need?" Rodney asked.

Since there were no chairs in Rodney's office except for his own, which Rodney said was his ingenious way of stopping people from lingering to chat, John sat down on the edge of Rodney's desk and handed over his tablet. "We were scheduled to go off-world. You ready to go back out there?"

Rodney frowned as he looked down at the tablet, his shoulders slumping slightly as he sat back in his chair. "It's just the market. Worst thing that should happen is we get shot at if we bump into one of the Genii cells."

They both knew that there were plenty of worse things that could happen at the market, the Wraith showing up to start with, but that was the worst that had happened so far. John shrugged. "We don't have to go. I can rearrange the schedule so that Lorne's team takes the market and we take their meet and greet that scheduled in five days."

Rodney immediately shook his head. "We need to go to the market. People will trade with you and Teyla; they know who you are, and Ronon is good for business. And Parrish wouldn't be able to tell what is halfway descent as far as alien technology goes, and whether or not the people are just scavengers."

John knew that all of that was true, that there was a reason that his team had to keep going out even after they were routinely captured, chased, and shot at. "I could take Radek. He'd know what to look for and you could stay here and threaten to send your scientists to the alpha site." It was the closest John had ever gotten to directly offering Rodney a way off the team.

"You're not taking Zelenka, I need him here to run system's maintenance next week and if we get kidnapped or mangled, he needs to be on Atlantis," Rodney said immediately and then sighed deeply. He handed John back the tablet. "That wasn't as terrifying as being in a Wraith Hive, not even close, so why am I still thinking about it? Usually I come back to Atlantis, shower and dive into a project and a few days later I'm fine, assuming I haven't actually been shot or stabbed or anything. I don't even remember much of anything beyond wanting breakfast."

"I know," John said, immediately getting what Rodney was saying. There wasn't much of anything about that mission, even though they'd spent a little while unconscious as a result, that should have been bothering him either. But the vague sense of something being off had been slipping through the back of his mind since the first night after he'd woken up.

"Do you think the technology did something to us?" Rodney asked. "I've already had Carson scan met twice since he released me from the infirmary, and he says nothing has changed."

John shrugged. "I doubt it," he said, though it was a possibility that he'd considered more than once after waking up from vague and unsettling dreams.

Rodney nodded suddenly. "Right. Just me going a little hypochondriac after being zapped with an alien machine, trying to save you I might add."

"I know, Rodney." John grimaced. "I wasn't saying that, I've..."

"You what?" Rodney asked when John didn't continue immediately.

"It's been a little weird," John finally said, looking out into the main lab so he didn't have to look at Rodney. "Are you good for going off-world in a few days."

Rodney sighed. "Yes, I am. It was already on my schedule, if you ever bother to look at it on the server."

"Good. You're coming to team night tonight?" John asked as he walked toward the door.

"Providing that you're not letting Reed or Parrish pick the movie. And no football!" Rodney called.

John didn't pause in the doorway, wondering what it would take to get everyone to agree on a movie choice. Considering they'd argued for more than an hour last time, John was strongly considering coordinating with Evan to bribe both of their teams to just have a quiet night where they watched a movie without anyone threatening anyone else. Then again, maybe he and Evan should have team night without their teams; that sounded infinitely more relaxing and their team members could bond as they tried to track them down. John didn't think that Evan would go for it, as he generally dismissed most of John's more devious plans, but it was worth a shot.

Back in his office, John confirmed his team's place on the mission roster and forwarded a copy of the entire roster to Elizabeth. She had asked if John was sure he was ready to go off-world again in that diplomatic way that meant she was concerned but too polite to say it. John didn't know that he was ready, though he wasn't exactly not ready either, but he would go because that's what he always did.

*****

John was getting used to opening his eyes to only darkness. He was starting to recognize where he was, a closet, because he could remember running through the dim hallways of the mansion and crawling inside the first door that opened. Damian was counting in the living room, kneeling down against the couch with his eyes covered by both his hands and the couch cushion so he couldn't peek, while everyone scattered. Hide and seek was a good game for playing inside, because it revolved around being quiet and none of the adults yelled when they were quiet, usually at least. Sometimes John and Dave, his little brother, could be so quiet that they almost melted away into the walls but Dad still yelled.

When had John climbed the stairs to the third level he couldn't hear Damian counting anymore, though he knew it was close to one hundred, and Damian always skipped a few numbers when he thought no one was listening. John had crawled inside a cabinet in the living room once and listened, and he hadn't been found until the very end.

John sat down on the floor, first with his legs folded up like they had to sit in assemblies at school, and then curled up so his knees were pressing against his chest and the heels of his shoes digging in against the backs of his thighs. He reached his hands forward and found the pattern that had been worked into the floor in metal. John didn't know why anyone would make a pattern in the floor of a closet, because people weren't supposed to go looking in the closets just in the parts of the house that were seen. The metal was cooler than everything else though the summer storm made the air feel sharp and tight.

He winced as his fingers caught on a sharp edge of the metal and when he drew them back they were bleeding. John curled his fingers up so he wouldn't get blood on his clothes or on the floor, but he thought he probably needed to press something against them to make them stop. Once he'd come in from outside, having fallen climbing the pasture fence, and his leg was bleeding all the way down into his sock. The cook had stopped him and used her handkerchief to hold against him until the bleeding stopped, and she'd given him a taste of batter from the cake she'd been cooking for dessert that night. He couldn't remember the taste of the cake batter at that moment; the smell of the blood as he cradled his hand near his chest overpowered the memory of ever tasting something as sweet and cloying as cake.

The door swung open, light pouring into the closet in sharp relief. Damian stood outside the closet with his arms folded and looked down at John. "I found you. You're it now."

John looked up, the stinging in his fingers as they dripped droplets of blood against his bare legs forgotten as he remembered Damian pushing him into a mud puddle a few months ago and Damian calling him a freak and a weirdo only a few days ago.

"Come on! You have to help me find everyone else," Damian glared down at John, looking like he was giant and looming in the narrow space created by the open door.

John tried to speak, wanted to tell Damian that he didn't want to go find everyone else because when everyone got bored with hide and seek, they'd want to play one of the games that John didn't understand and then they'd laugh at him. He thought about going and finding Dave, taking him home so that they could hide in one of the upstairs rooms where no one went, but Dave had his friends and wouldn't want to go home yet. Going home wasn't something John wanted to do anyway.

"Fine, stay here. Freak. The closet is a dumb place to hide," Damian sneered and then closed the door, leaving John alone in the darkness.

The door to leave was right there, John just had to get up and walk out. If he didn't, when Damian found everyone else he would probably just come back with them and they'd all stare at John. Dave wouldn't stare, Dave kinda understood that John was different, even though John himself couldn't really say why he was so different.

Maybe they would forget he was in here, and after a while he would slip out and go home. Maybe Dave will have already have gotten bored and gone home by himself, because John couldn't go home without Dave. He wouldn't leave Dave here by himself. John scooted to the back of the closet, still holding his hand in his lap even though he suspected that he'd dripped blood all over himself by now, and decided that waiting in here was better than sneaking around out there. If he waited until everyone else had been found he could sneak out and make a decision from there. No need to rush, just had to wait.

*****

When John opened his eyes it was still dark and he automatically tensed as he drew his legs up close. There was a small noise as he bumped into something warm and John scrambled back, expecting the wall of the closet to be just behind his back. The resulting crash as he tumbled directly off the bed startled him the rest of the way awake and the lights came on at full brightness as Evan leaned over the edge of the bed.

"John?" Evan asked as he rubbed his eyes and the lighting eased back towards dim.

"Yeah, sorry," John said. He closed his eyes for a moment and felt as his heart beat started to slow back towards normal.

Evan moved across the bed so that he was sitting on the edge. His bare foot nudged the calf of John's leg. "Do you need to go to Beckett?"

John shook his head, because he was fine. Physically fine, if a bit sweaty and just a touch out of breath like he'd been jogging across one of the piers at midday. When John opened his eyes he found Evan staring down at him, his expression as confused and worried as when John had woken him up in the infirmary after finding him asleep against the edge of John's bed.

After a moment, Evan held out his hand and waited.

Placing his hand in Evan's, John was a little disconcerted at the ease with which Evan pulled John up to his feet and then back into bed. They settled back in, John opting for staying on top of the blankets for the time being while he cooled down. The lights dimmed further, though not back into complete darkness and John realized that it was a new moon, which was why there hadn't been any light coming through the window.

"When I was a kid I used to have night terrors. Used to scare the hell out of my mom and sisters, even though I didn't really remember them the next day. Sometimes I'd sleep walk too, and I'd wake up in the living room, or my mom's bedroom, and discover that I'd been clawing at the wall or kicking everything in sight while screaming at the top of my lungs," Evan said, his tone light and casual despite the subject.

"Sounds like it was disconcerting," John said, not sure where exactly Evan was going with this.

Evan shifted closer, his hand resting on top of John's. "The doctors said it was something I would grow out of, a temporary brain chemistry thing exacerbated by stress. Maybe this machine altered something in your brain chemistry and it would only be detectable while you were sleeping. That could be what is causing your nightmares," he suggested.

John shifted on the bed, more uncomfortable with the discussion than he was willing to admit out loud. "Maybe," he agreed. "Though, they're not really nightmares."

"They sound like nightmares when you're squirming around making noises that might be rather adorable in other circumstances," Evan said.

John turned so that he could glare at Evan, knowing that Evan know he was glaring even in the dark. When he was certain he'd gotten his point across, John rolled onto his back. "I don't know what it is. I'm not afraid or upset in the dream, not at all."

Evan hesitated, probably debating whether or not to ask John about the contents of the dream after being shot down the last four nights in a row. "Are you sure you want to go off-world tomorrow? My team can still take the mission."

"It's not a mission, it's a trip to the Pegasus version of a shopping mall," John said as he reached down and grabbed the blankets now that he had cooled off. "We'll be fine."

"We could come with you. More eyes, more guns, better chance of finding someone we want to trade with," Evan pointed out.

"Right, because more guns makes people want to trade with us. Evan, I don't need you babysitting me. Not off-world, not on Atlantis," John shifted, not wanting to have this conversation at all, let alone in bed in the middle of the night.

Evan sighed. "Not baby-sitting. I know you can handle yourself and that your team is awesomely capable even though the entire galaxy seems to be out to get you."

"Not the entire galaxy. I think there's at least a few people on most of the planets we go to that don't want to see me dead," John said, glad that Evan seemed to be dropping the subject.

"Right. Just make sure you find them before the people with torches and pitchforks find you. And next time you're about to do something for the sake of diplomacy, don't. I don't care if it's eating a sacred mango or whatever, just don't," Evan said, almost interrupting himself as he yawned.

John smiled as he rolled toward Evan, their knees colliding but not painfully. "I'm telling Teyla you said that."

Evan gave a small huff of laughter. "I don't care, she can kick my ass in the gym, just as long as you come back home safe and sound."

John shifted himself on the bed until he was mostly comfortable, not willing to lie to Evan and promise him that they would come back safe from their mission. They both knew the risks, knew that they couldn't promise each other that. When he closed his eyes he willed himself not to go back to the darkness of the dream that had been plaguing him ever since he'd regained consciousness. The dream had been weird enough to start with, without it playing on repeat every night.

*****

Evan was going to kill him when he got back to Atlantis. John rolled over onto his side, grimacing at the way his head was pounding and his mouth was thick and dry. He knew better than to try and push himself up right away, he wouldn't even have moved onto his side if he hadn't felt like he was about to be sick, but he figured that vomiting would have alerted whoever might be watching that he was awake anyway.

He stayed on his side and thought about Evan for another few minutes while his stomach stopped rolling, thought about him already with his team and searching and would be there soon. John let himself imagine, just for a moment that Evan was already wherever this was, aiming guns and glaring at people until they pointed to where John was being held. And then they'd go back home to Atlantis and John would convince Evan to skip the infirmary just this once and they'd go back to Evan's quarters, their quarters, and curl up on their bed and John would sleep the entire night without any weird dreams, nightmares or otherwise.

The sad part of that little fantasy that John was pretty sure the most unrealistic part of it was Evan agreeing to let him not go to the infirmary. John was positive that he'd spent more time in the infirmary since he'd started dating and living with Evan then in his entire first year on Atlantis; all because when he would have just curled up on the bed and waited it out, Evan was already calling for Beckett on the radio.

Pushing aside the daydream, now that the floor had seemed to stabilize beneath him, John opened his eyes and waited to see what reality had brought for him. It was dark, and for a moment John thought he was just in one of his dreams. But this didn't feel like a dream, even though that particular recurring dream felt more real than any dream he'd ever had, and he remembered pretty clearly taking a dart of some kind to his back. Sure enough, when John pushed his fingers under the collar of his shirt he found a sore and swelling lump right above his left shoulder blade.

After his eyes had adjusted to where he could make out his surroundings, John sat up and took a better look around. He was in a cell of some sort, metal bars set into smooth stone walls that had been naturally carved out by the forces of nature long before someone had set up their prison here. The whole underground thing was starting to get old pretty fast and both the Genii cell he'd been held in nearly a year earlier, and the damned Kamma Ket circle, were at the forefront of his mind. He nearly missed that he had a companion in the cell, only the slightest twitch of movement catching John's eye as he slowly looked around for any way out.

Cautiously, John walked over to the form, keeping his body low to the ground and his hands ready to catch himself if he stumbled due to his lack of equilibrium. "Hey," John said, his voice rasping.

The barely visible form just hunkered down upon itself, knees drawn up to its chest and head tucked down against them. The fabric of his clothing rustled in a way that was far too familiar, and John brushed his fingers against the man's arm and found the patches he'd been looking for. "McKay," John said, both relieved and aggravated.

"Please, don't touch me," Rodney said, the words almost too muffled to make out. His head hunched down further as he squeezed his limbs closer to his torso. "Please, don't. Please."

"Rodney, it's me." John withdrew his hand, a little freaked out. He'd seen Rodney panicking before, seen him terrified they were about to die or be fed upon by the Wraith or even be tortured. Rodney panicking didn't look anything like the quiet, shivering man who was curled up and pressed into the corner of their cell. "I'm right here, okay. Just going to sit here until you remember who I am."

Maybe whatever drug they used to knock them out was having some kind of side-effect on Rodney, or maybe Rodney had hit his head when they'd been hit with the drugged darts. John remembered it as happening pretty quickly; the sharp pain of the dart and his feet falling out from beneath him, and then the darkness. He tried to put the rest of the day together, his memory a little fuzzy of the events directly preceding the attack.

They had been at the market for maybe two hours, Rodney identifying several stalls with technology that was advanced enough to make it worthwhile to initiate contact, while Teyla and Ronon were working on the gossip and goods line of negotiation. They'd met up about an hour into the day before splitting up again. John had no idea how long he'd been unconscious, or how many 'gates they'd gone through before they arrived on this planet, but by now Teyla and Ronon should have alerted Atlantis to their disappearance. Assuming that they hadn't taken Teyla and Ronon separately and they weren't in an adjacent cell in this complex. Either way, their check in probably should have happened hours ago by now, if John's dehydration and headache were anything to go by, so teams would be out looking for them. Evan would be out looking for them.

"Doing okay in there, buddy?" John asked, shifting to make himself more comfortable on the cold stone of the ground.

"John?" Rodney asked, his voice wavering slightly. His head poked up a little and peered in John's direction.

"Back with me?" John asked, still cautious but hopeful.

Rodney nodded and untucked his limbs from his body as he looked around the cell. "Where are we?"

"Kidnapped. Hopefully they're just looking for ransom or a trade advantage or something," John said, trying to stay upbeat because he still wasn't sure what that had just been with Rodney and didn't want a repeat of it any time soon. "They'll be looking for us by now. Someone at the market might have seen something. Our people are good. They'll find us."

Rodney just sighed and rubbed at his face with his hands, lapsing back into uncharacteristic silence.

"We should at least look at the locking mechanism. I haven't seen any guards yet. We might be able to break out, get to the surface and find the 'gate. Can't be too far from here, I can't imagine they wanted to carry us a long way," John pointed out.

After a minute, Rodney pushed himself to his feet using the wall to keep his balance. "So, some underground prison thing and we don't know who took us?" he asked, looking around and sounding a little more together, a little more himself.

"That just about sums it up," John agreed, getting to his own feet and narrowly missing hitting his head on the low ceiling.

Rodney started on one end of the bars, feeling his way along for joints and hinges they might be able to work on, and John made his way to the other end.

"Got the door," Rodney said after a few minutes. "And the lock. Not high tech, but nothing we're getting out from the inside without the key."

John finished his section of the bars and met up with Rodney, his fingers finding the lock and reaching the same conclusion. After the number of times they'd been held captive they all had some basic lock picking skills, but John had already found that he'd been stripped of everything but his clothing, and his boot laces wouldn't quite work for this. "Good to know. We'll just have to wait until someone comes and assess the situation from there. We might be able to overpower a guard, take his weapon."

"Great, just great," Rodney said, though it didn't quite hit the same tone as usual. He walked to the back of the cell, both of them adept at navigating in dark places.

John joined him a moment later, sinking down onto the ground and wondering if their keepers would at least be bringing them water. If they were being held for ransom or leverage on a trade agreement, they'd want to keep them alive; if they wanted to kill them or torture them, whoever had taken them would have done so already. It was a little sad that John couldn't think of any other reasons that they could have been taken, but in his experience that just about covered it. "Doing alright?" he finally asked, a little unnerved that Rodney wasn't pacing and hypothesizing.

Rodney nodded, the movement sudden and almost lost in the darkness. "Fine."

Turning his head slowly, John considered Rodney. Rodney was never just 'fine', he was always something that involved a lot of words and was generally complicated and detailed. "Do you want to talk about it?" John asked, the words awkward and uncertain.

Rodney stared in silence for a moment as if considering the question. "I've been having this dream. Ever since the Kamma Ket circle thing, and it always starts out in the dark and cold and when I woke up in here I thought that I was there. Except not in the dream, actually there."

John's jaw dropped, Evan's theories about the circle and the dreams being connected suddenly having a lot more potential. "What happens in your dream?"

"I don't know. I mean, I know some, but every time the lights go on I wake up. Or Jamie wakes me up and says I've been thrashing and shouting. I'm not even really afraid until I wake up," Rodney said. His head was bowed down again and his outline growing smaller as he hunched in on himself.

Lost for a moment as he considered the similarities, it took John a moment to latch onto the pertinent piece of information. "Jamie?"

"What?" Rodney asked, obviously distracted.

"Jamie? As in James? James Coughlin?" John asked, the name suddenly coming together in his mind.

"Oh, right." Rodney was studiously not looking in John's direction.

"How long has this been going on? When were you going to tell me? Does Evan know you're sleeping with his lieutenant?" The questions were suddenly very important to John, as Rodney had been the first to know about John and Evan. Well, the first after Teyla, because John couldn't exactly stop her from noticing things, but Rodney was the first person John had told.

"Well, in order: a little over two months, as soon as we were sure, and absolutely not," Rodney said. When John just waited in silence, Rodney sighed and continued. "We wanted to be sure that it wasn't just a random fling while we were a bit drunk and off-world. And then we wanted to be sure that it wasn't just your and Evan's sappy romantic stuff rubbing off on us. I was going to tell you, when the time was right."

John just stared, trying to decided whether or not he should be more concerned about Rodney and Coughlin getting together while drunk and off-world or the fact that Rodney had just called him sappy and romantic. Deciding that neither was a problem he wanted to tackle at the moment, John's hands found their way into his hair as they often did when he was overstressed. "Make Coughlin tell Evan before he finds out some other way and comes after you for seducing his lieutenants."

"Lieutenant. Singular, just one. There is no way I could stand Reed's taste in movies long enough to make out with him, let alone take him to my bed," Rodney defended himself.

"That's not the point, though if you're with Coughlin because you like his taste in movies..." John trailed off as he reminded himself this was not the place to tackle this issue. "Just have Coughlin tell Evan so he knows why Coughlin will be all freaked out over us being missing."

Rodney groaned. "I never even thought of that."

"Evan's team hasn't gone missing for more than a few hours since you've starting seeing Coughlin, has it?" John asked, quickly going over to the times that Evan's team had been missing off-world in the last few months.

"Just once, and we were out there. We found them, followed the trail straight to them. If our captors took us through more than one 'gate, I don't know how they'll find us," Rodney looked at John.

"They'll find us," John said, his voice full of certainty that he didn't quite feel. "They'll find us or we'll get out and go to them."

Rodney nodded, willing to join John in that belief because there was nothing else he could do. "Three hundred and sixty seven."

John sighed. "Seriously, Rodney? Here?"

"Better that than falling asleep," Rodney said.

Willing to concede the point, John quickly went through the factors in his head. "Prime. Seven hundred and twenty nine."

*****

Despite their rousing game of Prime/Not Prime the time passed slowly and John found himself going back over his conversation with Rodney up until the point where they'd gotten side tracked over Rodney's relationship with Coughlin apparently having progressed the point that they were regularly sharing the same bed. It was enough that Rodney was having the nightmares at all, including the strange terror response upon waking up that wasn't part of the dream, for John to conclude that it had something to do with the Kamma Ket circle. If Evan wasn't having the same nightmares, and apparently Coughlin now, and the rest of the people who had gone to the planet with the Kamma Ket weren't experiencing similar symptoms, that left their experience in the circle as the most likely culprit.

"You said that your dream always starts in the dark?" John asked. They had been silent for a while now, and John couldn't remember who had asked the last number or if there had been an answer.

Rodney moved suddenly, the sound of his boots scraping against the rock beneath them evidence of his surprise. "Yes. Complete darkness. Just like this."

John nodded, letting his eyes close for a moment even if it didn't change much of what he could see. If he let himself, he could feel the hardwood floor under his fingers instead of the rock that he was sitting on. The roughness was uneven though, not in any discernible shape or pattern and John didn't feel the sudden sting of his skin being opened against it.

"John?" Rodney asked.

John opened his eyes and turned in Rodney's direction, finding his outline after a moment of searching. "Right here."

"Good," Rodney said. He swallowed audibly. "I'm glad I'm not alone. If you weren't here I wouldn't be able to tell the difference between this and the dream. Well, except for this is a cave, and in my dream it's a room. And I would have figured that out as soon as I tried to move about, but it might have taken a little while."

"What type of room?" John asked, not sure if he was hoping Rodney would say it was a closet with a hardwood floor and soft long coats.

Rodney paused. "A bedroom. I think. It's hard to tell in the dark."

"Oh," was the only response John could give.

There was another long silence only broken by the way they occasionally shifted against the rock, their boots and clothes making soft rustling noises that seemed loud and intrusive in the small space. The cell was actually of a descent size, as far as places to be held captive went, but the darkness made it feel smaller, almost suffocating. In that respect it was not at all like the closet in John's dream, which didn't feel confining at all despite the narrow space.

"You've been having a recurring dream too," Rodney said, his voice flat and not quite accusatory. "That's why you were asking me, to see if they were the same."

"Yes," John agreed, not seeing the point in denying it.

"Well?" Rodney prompted.

John frowned. He didn't usually talk about his dreams to anyone, not even to Evan after he woke clutching his chest and gasping with the memory of being fed on by a Wraith still drowning him. Psychologists had asked sometimes, when he had mandatory sessions after particularly disastrous missions, and several times after the failed mission in Afghanistan they had asked about the contents of his nightmares. John hadn't been having nightmares after Afghanistan, he simply hadn't been sleeping. By the time he reached Antarctica they had stopped with the psychologists and he had allowed everything in his mind to freeze to where he didn't remember his dreams even when he woke shaking and shivering.

"It starts in the dark, like yours," John finally said. He ducked his head and was glad that they were being held in the dark. He didn't think he could do this if he and Rodney were sitting together in some well lit prison, facing each other as they talked.

"And?" Rodney prompted.

John wondered what he could possibly say that would make this particular dream begin to make any sense. Parts of it were closer to memory than they were to dream, and the way it progressed was more like memory. What would Rodney say if he knew that John was more like the social outcast that Rodney had revealed himself to be in childhood than the mythical flyboy Kirk that John had been accused of being on more than one occasion? Finally John decided to just stick with the basic facts, things that might help them figure out what the Kamma Ket had done. "There's a circle on the floor, like the one with the Kamma Ket, but only part of it. I cut myself on it every time."

"The circle is in my dream too. On the floor and I'm sitting inside it. Are you inside the circle?" Rodney asked, sounding excited.

John thought, remembering recoiling each time he was cut by the circle. But he ventured outside of it when he reached for the handle on the closet without any repercussions. "To start with, but I can leave. It doesn't trap me like the real circle did."

"That makes sense, because the circle couldn't have actually been there," Rodney said thoughtfully.

"Actually?" John asked before he thought about what he was asking. Rodney had no compunctions about demanding answers in return and had never been particularly reticent about sharing details of his life before Atlantis.

Rodney paused again, and when he started talking it was with a great deal of hesitation. "My dream is closer to a memory that I don't recall. It feels more real than most dreams. The environment seems to obey the laws of physics, and time progresses normally. I think I might be remembering something that happened, something that was real."

John felt his stomach churn and he rested his head in his hands. "Yes," he said after a while, because he couldn't bring himself to clarify further and he didn't particularly want to think about it either. If the dream was a memory, John didn't want to know what happened next. "Don't let me fall asleep."

*****


	4. Chapter 4

Evan already had his pack ready to go, his tac vest and his off-world jacket were hanging in his locker and his P-90 was clean and loaded. John's team had already been gone for just under two hours and it was only through the sheer force of his will that he wasn't up in the control room asking Chuck to dial the planet so John's team could check in. They were scheduled for a check in after three hours, and Evan wasn't sure if the fact that he'd seen the rest of his team, including David, down in the gear up room making sure their stuff was ready to go.

Normally Evan wouldn't encourage David to go on a rescue mission, but John's team had become family to Evan's team, and David was good at interviewing people. If John's team went missing, and Evan had to keep reminding himself that it was an 'if' and not a 'when', then their first step would be showing the laminating pictures they had of each team member around to find out where they were last seen, and if Evan was particularly lucky, who had taken them. Evan pretended that John didn't know that he kept one of the laminated pictures of John in his vest pocket, and he pretended that John didn't have a worn and wrinkled one of him. He'd like to pretend that they both hadn't gotten more use out of them than he'd ever expected when they first made them for off-world teams.

There was paperwork he could be doing; he could actually think of at least a dozen things he should be doing, and instead all he could do was hover near the control room so that he was right there when he was summoned and think about how much he wished he could keep John from going off-world. It was never a discussion he would have with John. He might suggest that John take a break from going off-world after a rough mission, but he would never ask him to not go, just as he knew John would never ask that of him. Their lives were not entirely their own, especially while living on Atlantis, and it was a commitment neither of them would break or back out of. And the truth was that neither of them wanted to, not even after being kidnapped or nearly killed by the Wraith.

Evan would say that he had a bad feeling about John going off-world, sometimes he even got them right before he went off-world with his team, but statistically considering how frequently things went bad while they were off-world, the feeling only made sense. Instead, he just had a sinking feeling that he was going to be spending the rest of the day and probably into the night looking for John and hoping that he got him back in one piece.

"Any word yet?" Coughlin asked, already with his tac vest on.

"Not yet. Their check isn't for another hour, and if we don't hear from them by then we'll go through fifteen minutes after that," Evan said, thinking about it and then deciding not to comment on the vest. If Coughlin wanted to walk around prepared it wasn't the most maladaptive coping behavior he'd seen in a combat zone, not by a long shot.

Coughlin just sighed, walked another few paces toward the control room before turning suddenly and walking back in the direction he'd came. "Reed and David are ready. Radio us when we have a go."

Evan rolled his eyes but didn't comment. The situation with the Kamma Ket hadn't been forgotten yet by any of them, and he wasn't going to blame his team if things were a little tense.

"Major Lorne, please report to the control room," Elizabeth's voice sounded over the radio, clear but with enough concern that Evan was tearing up the staircase before she finished talking.

The 'gate was already active and Elizabeth was holding her hand up to her ear piece, which she only did when she was distracted and stressed. "I understand the situation. I will have a team to you in less than five minutes."

Evan tapped his radio without bothering to wait for Elizabeth to give the command. "Coughlin, get the team up to the 'gate room."

"Yes, sir," Coughlin responded immediately.

The 'gate disengaged and Evan jogged up the rest of the steps to where Elizabeth was standing next to Chuck and the DHD console.

"Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay are not responding to radio calls from Ronon and Teyla and they have not been able to locate them at the market. Major, take your team and assist Ronon and Teyla in finding any leads to their whereabouts. We'll have reinforcements ready here by the time you have a location," Elizabeth said. Her expression was tight and her tone diplomatic, but there was a sense of both fury and resignation in her words.

"Yes, Ma'am. We'll bring them home," Evan responded immediately. He saw his team out of the corner of his eye and noticed that they had brought his gear with them.

"I know you will. You have a go," Elizabeth said, nodding as Chuck dialed the 'gate.

Evan went back down the stairs, his pace and expression controlled as he pulled on his vest and relayed the information that Elizabeth had given him. By the time the 'gate activated again, they were all stony-faced and Evan could see Coughlin and Reed already easing their guns in their holsters. David was standing tall, determined and grim, though he was holding onto his pictures of John and Rodney rather than his gun.

"Move out," Evan instructed, setting the pace and feeling his team fall into place around him.

*****

They had split up as soon as they'd arrived and had met with Teyla and Ronon. Part of Evan had resisted the idea, knowing that was how John and Rodney had been taken in the first place, but it was the fastest way to cover the teeming market. They were all hyper alert now, aware of who was near them and probably a little jumpy to boot. Coughlin had nearly took a swing at a traveler who had backed into him, and only Evan quickly smoothing things over had prevented it from escalating into a fight.

As preoccupied as Evan was with talking to merchants and other people who looked like they might be reputable sources of information, showing John and Rodney's pictures and often receiving nods that they'd been seen about two hours ago, it took longer than it should have to notice that Coughlin was not handling the search as well as he had in the past. It was only then that he saw that his copy of Rodney's picture was a little more curled and wrinkled than it should have been.

"Seriously, Coughlin? McKay?" Evan asked, not sure whether he should be checking Coughlin for signs that he'd been drugged or hypnotized or something, or just asking him what he could possibly be thinking.

Coughlin had the grace, and the youth, to blush. "He's a good guy."

That was a statement that Evan couldn't really argue with, because Rodney was a good guy under all of the bravado and bluster. Evan sighed, because he didn't really have any high ground when it came to the subject of getting involved with coworkers. And it wasn't such a bad thing, because if it had been someone from another team Evan would have felt obligated to get to know that team, and the whole thing was becoming too ridiculous and familial for Evan's tastes.

"Fine, whatever. We'll talk about that later. Can you keep it together right now?" Evan asked firmly.

"Yes, sir. I'm not a liability," Coughlin responded, his back snapping straight.

"Good," Evan nodded, a swift jerk of his head. Then he reached out and put a hand on Coughlin's shoulder. "We'll find them."

"Yes, sir," Coughlin said again, though whether it was out of agreement or something else, Evan couldn't tell.

"Parrish to Lorne," David said over the radio.

Evan twisted around automatically, scanning for the top of David's head over the crowds surrounding them. "Lorne here. What do you have?"

"A trader who says that he saw people in uniforms like ours being carted away toward the 'gate, about an hour ago," David said quickly. "I couldn't get him to stay, but he gave me a description of who we're looking for."

Evan met Coughlin's eyes and nodded. It was a start. "Everyone meet back at the 'gate. We'll go from there."

*****

It took them nearly another twenty hours after David got the description of the people who had taken John and Rodney for them to locate the correct set of caves. After they'd scoured the market for as much information about the Inyuti as they could persuade people to tell them, sometimes with barter, threats or promises of trade agreements, Evan ordered everyone back to Atlantis to regroup.

A diplomatic team, with Teyla and a pair of marines at their side, was sent to the home world of the Inyuti to request an audience with their leaders and see if they could make any inroads that way. When their leaders had refused to speak with anyone but a military leader, despite Teyla's insistence that a group of Inyuti were the ones who had taken their military leader, Evan had gone back through with his team.

After more waiting around and brief meetings and pleasantries, Evan had eventually been escorted to the leaders of the city by the 'gate. If he wasn't so focused on finding out where John and Rodney were, and why they'd been taken in the first place, Evan would have noted that their city seemed well developed by Pegasus standards and even reasonably advanced technologically. As it was he didn't bother with learning names or titles or local customs, and no one on his team made any suggestion that they should behave otherwise.

They met inside what appeared to be a permanent tent, the majority of the area filled up with a table that was covered with papers and maps and figurines. Evan would go as far to call it a war room, somewhere these people used to plan for battle. The leader didn't give him a chance to speak, Evan standing uselessly with Coughlin and Reed weaponless beside him and David still holding onto John and Rodney's pictures with a silent appeal to everyone around them. There was a long explanation involving various factions of the Inyuti and the battles that had been fought, and finally the revelation that a small faction going by the name Inyutar had recently allied with the Genii.

It had taken all of Evan's control not to wilt right then, to not think about the last time the Genii had imprisoned John and wonder if they were stupid enough to keep him alive this time. Probably, Evan thought; Kolya was too angry with John to just kill him outright, though what they would do with Rodney was unknown. He had immediately asked where the Inyutar would have taken their prisoners and received a list of eight known 'gate addresses in return with the warning that they could easily have more hiding places on other worlds. When Evan turned to leave, the leader informed him that they only reason they were sharing information so freely was because of the reputation of men in the uniform that Evan wore and that they would hope their cooperation would be remembered and reciprocated.

Evan, grudgingly not thinking about the eight hours that had passed since John and Rodney's disappearance, assured them that their assistance would be remembered and that trade and alliance negotiations were possibilities at some point after they'd recovered their people.

The trip back through the city to the 'gate was done in silence, the entire team tense and grim with the knowledge that the Genii could have John and Rodney by now. He would try to reassure himself that at least it wasn't the Wraith, but after Todd the Wraith, Evan couldn't even know that John and Rodney weren't being fed on somewhere. But they were alive. He would believe that until he had irrefutable proof, and considering that John had once brought his dog tags and a pile of ash back to Atlantis only to discover that it hadn't been Evan at all, it would have to be some damn good proof.

Evan had picked five teams of marines for the other 'gate addresses the Inyuti had told them about; three to split the 'gate addresses with them and two to go to known worlds that the Genii frequented to pick up any gossip. If the Genii already had John and Rodney there would be rumors flying. By now, most of the 'gate-faring Pegasus galaxy knew that people missing from Atlantis were a big deal and that they would not rest until their people were returned. The five teams were as many as could be spared with the Daedalus in the middle of a supply and personnel run back to Earth and a platoon stationed with the task of securing a beta site that couldn't be pulled from the process for another twelve hours. Both the alpha and the beta sites had been alerted that John and Rodney were missing and to be on alert for their arrival and potentially poor medical condition.

David had stood down when Evan had guided him off to the side of the 'gate room, reluctant to be left behind while John and Rodney were missing, but all too aware that he could potentially slow them down in a combat situation. Evan had made his silent promise, his hand grasping tightly onto David's with David squeezing back and a firm if distressed nod of approval.

Ronon and Teyla had returned from one of the larger hubs in the galaxy, reporting that there was knowledge that two Atlantians had been taken but nothing to suggest a widely known culprit or location yet, and had joined Evan, Coughlin, and Reed to check out the first planet on the Inyuti list.

Another ten hours later, after traversing the area around the first Inyutar planet and nearly getting captured themselves, followed by receiving reports from the teams who had been sent out, Evan had nearly dropped to the ground in relief when the scanner picked up the signals of two subcutaneous transponders and the life signs detector picked up two life signs deep in a cave system just beyond the small settlement that was next to the 'gate.

"Let's go," Evan said, letting Ronon and Teyla take the lead once they'd identified the caves. The life signs detector showed that there were maybe twenty Inyutar in the settlement, but none in the caves guarding John and Rodney. If they were careful - because Evan wasn't even going to think the word lucky - they could get through the caves, get John and Rodney, and get back to Atlantis without ever alerting the Inyutar to their presence.

He kept the life signs detector out as they worked their way through the maze of caves, the two steady lights more reassuring than Evan had imagined. Hopefully this meant that the Genii hadn't been here yet, because the Genii knew better than to leave John and Rodney unguarded even in this labyrinth. If there was a way out of something, John and Rodney would find it; John had proved that with Todd.

"Anyone following us?" Coughlin asked, picking up his pace so that he was walking abreast with Evan for a moment.

Evan showed Coughlin the screen, hoping that the two dots would provide the same reassurance. "We're looking good. Almost there."

Coughlin nodded, his flashlight steadily swinging over many tunnel entrances they passed as they went through a passage that double backed in the direction they'd just come from. "Maybe it's a good thing they didn't escape. This place is ridiculous."

Looking to where Ronon was tracking the steps of the Inyutar who had brought John and Rodney there, Evan just shook his head. "They would have found a way. You have to believe that."

Coughlin was silent for a moment before he just nodded and moved back to where he was bringing up the end of the group with Reed. Evan wasn't sure that his meaning had gotten through, but there would be time for that later. Right now they were as close to John and Rodney as they'd gotten all day, though it was now sometime in the morning on Atlantis, and Evan wasn't about to let anything distract him from that goal.

The rest of the walk seemed to drag on interminably, Evan reminding himself that patience was the best thing he could have right now with the scanner assuring him that John and Rodney were alive, and the chill of the caves left the skin on his hands and back of his neck stiff and cold. He tried not to imagine how cold John and Rodney must be after sitting in these caves for a full day, assuming they hadn't been just been placed there temporarily for safe keeping. There were no good scenarios Evan could think of for kidnapping, no good intentions and no matter what had or hadn't happened nothing would change the fact that they were taken to begin with.

Evan knew they were close when they started to pass cells, metal bars set into openings in the cave walls that made excellent prisons. They shone their lights into each cell even though the life signs detector indicated that there was no one except John and Rodney waiting for them. There weren't any bones or remains in any of the cells, which Evan decided to take as a good sign. Maybe the Inyutar have fed John and Rodney, made assurances to keep them alive. Or maybe they're just fastidious housekeepers. He listened carefully, hoping for John or Rodney's voice to call out to them. They were close enough now that they had to know someone was approaching, the sound of their boots against the cave floors making muffled echoes.

"John," Evan said tonelessly as the beam of his flashlight landed where John was curled up on the cave floor. Coughlin made a wordless sound next to him, his eyes wide and anguished as he stared into the cell. Both John and Rodney were asleep, which was surprising but Evan could think of a dozen explanations for them not to keep watch, and they were both moving with small jolts that indicated they were in the throes of nightmares.

Reed was already at the lock, examining the mechanism while digging in his vest for tools.

"Move," Ronon instructed gruffly.

Evan turned just in time to see Ronon pull out his gun, an energy blaster that he'd never heard given a name, and Reed rapidly scrambled to the side.

Ronon shot the locking mechanism, the metal vaporizing with one blast and thankfully didn't weld the metal between the door and the frame together. More concerning was that neither John nor Rodney woke at the sound.

Evan was through the door as soon Ronon pulled it open, dropping painfully to his knees at John's side and checking his pulse and breathing before carefully pulling his shoulders up to rest on Evan's knees. "Come on, wake up," he said, not really aware that he was speaking. Teyla was at his side a moment later, one of her hands gently touching John's forehead and the other deftly catching John's arm as he began to struggle.

When Evan looked up, his flashlight where he'd dropped it on the floor still providing illumination, Coughlin and Ronon were pulling Rodney up a little, Coughlin wrapping his arms around Rodney even as Rodney made small rocking motions accompanied by a low keening sound. Reed was standing guard at the entrance of the cell, holding the life signs detector that Evan had handed him and his finger on the trigger of his P-90.

Coughlin looked up and saw Evan watching, his expression still grim. "Rodney's been having nightmares just like this ever since the Kamma Ket," he said quietly, as though that would stop the rest of the group from hearing.

Evan nodded, his theory that the Kamma Ket had something to do with John's nightmares partially vindicated. "He usually wakes on his own?"

"Yeah," Coughlin said, looking back down as he adjusted his hold on Rodney.

No one seemed particularly surprised that Coughlin and Rodney were close enough for Coughlin to know about Rodney's nightmares, and Evan wondered if he'd simply been that distracted and dense or if everyone was too preoccupied with the situation to take notice of the implications. Evan frowned, the memory of the last time he carried John back to the 'gate too fresh for comfort, and the last time John hadn't been shifting and struggling. It was his call how long they stayed, how long they would wait for John and Rodney to wake before they took the chance of carrying them back to the 'gate. It wouldn't be stealthy by any means, and if there was a firefight someone would undoubtably get hurt.

Before he had to make the decision, Rodney sputtered and shouted, violently fighting both Ronon and Coughlin's hands as he struggled to get away from them. Teyla left John and Evan's side, moving to help calm Rodney as he woke while Evan held John tighter and sent a questioning glance to Reed.

Reed looked at the scanner and shook his head. They were alone and safe for the time being.

"No, no! Stop!" Rodney shouted, managing to tumble away from reaching hands and to the back wall of the cell.

There was nothing more Evan could do expect to watch in silence as Rodney crumpled down, pressing himself against the wall and descending into the muffled sobs filled with words that Evan can't make out. Coughlin was the one to approach him, shaking off both Teyla and Ronon with a simple shake of his head and plea in his expression, and he quietly coaxed Rodney back to awareness.

John woke with a started cry, catching Evan off guard as he rolled out of Evan's grasp.

"John," Evan said immediately, not grabbing onto him but waiting warily to see how far John would stray.

Looking wildly around the cave, John gave a couple of stuttered gasps and then honed in on Evan's abandoned flashlight. He grasped it tightly, looking around with sudden jerky movements and wild eyes. "Evan?" he asked, staring at him for a long moment.

"Yeah," Evan confirmed. "You were taken from the market, do you remember?"

John's hand came up to touch the back of his neck and he nodded, letting out a broken sigh. "Yes."

It took a moment, but John pushed himself to his feet and carefully put together a semblance of his Team Leader, Super Colonel face. It wasn't quite as believable as his usual laid back charm with the sly smile, but it was close enough that Evan could let himself pretend to believe it until they got back to Atlantis.

"Are we getting out of here?" John asked.

Evan glanced back and found Rodney on his feet, his arms folded tight over his chest and his expression hidden as he kept his head turned away from everyone. Coughlin nodded, unable to hide his own concern.

"Yeah, we're going back to Atlantis. No one knows we're here and we'd like to keep it that way," Evan said. He pulled his Beretta from his holster and handed it to John, knowing that John would feel better if he was armed and able to fight back.

John accepted the gun, but let Ronon take the lead as they started to file out of the cell.

Evan didn't miss the way John looked at Rodney, the barely disguised concern mingling with something closer to guilt and maybe even fear. There wasn't much John was afraid of, Evan had discovered. Facing down the Wraith or Genii, even without a weapon, didn't really faze John in the slightest unless he was the only thing between the danger and the rest of his team. Bombing things, escaping from caved in mines and caverns, and talking down villagers who wanted to sacrifice him to their deities didn't even make the list of things that made John nervous. Not for the first time, Evan wondered what was in this nightmare that was throwing John so off-balance, and what was in Rodney's nightmares to cause John to look at Rodney like that.

The journey back to the 'gate was silent and uneventful. Evan stayed at the back of the group with Reed so he could keep an eye on everyone, and he found himself looking over his shoulder more often than not. The Inyutar didn't make an appearance, and despite Evan's concerns, the Genii didn't walk through the 'gate just as they dialed Atlantis.

Even though it was around five in the morning, and Evan would make an educated guess that no one awake had gone to bed that night, the 'gate room was reasonably crowded with people waiting for them to return. The relief as they stepped through with John and Rodney was visible; marines and airmen letting down their guard and saluting before they disappeared from the room, David slumped against the wall at the top of the stairs, and Elizabeth used both of her hands to push her hair off her face before she smiled and hurried down the steps to greet them.

"Welcome home," Elizabeth said, keeping her smile even as she was assessing John and Rodney for indications that they were wounded.

"Glad to be back," John drawled, still not quite matching his usual tone.

"I believe Carson is waiting to check you over in the infirmary. He'll be glad to see you both," Elizabeth said, giving the direction without making it an order.

Usually Rodney would have made some miserably sarcastic comment about doctors and the medical profession, but when none was forthcoming Evan glanced back to find Rodney still slumped and grim. "I'll make sure they get there," Evan offered quickly, flashing Elizabeth a tired smile of his own when the hints of worry reappeared around her eyes.

"I'd appreciate that. Now, if there are no more emergencies tonight, I think I'll try to get a few hours of sleep. Senior staff meeting is moved to Friday," Elizabeth said, taking one more glance over all of them before turn and going back up to her office.

Evan directed John toward the hallway with the closest transporter, clasping hands with Reed and nodding when David joined them before they split into smaller groups. Teyla and Ronon followed them a ways further, Rodney and Coughlin lagging behind them all. John bid Teyla and Ronon a goodnight when the reached the transporter, and Evan found himself at the end of a steely concerned gaze from Teyla just as they turned to leave.

"You don't think we can skip the infirmary, just this once?" John asked, his shoulder bumping against Evan's.

"Absolutely not," Evan said firmly. "First of all, you've probably come down with a cold from being in that cave, and secondly, I'm not getting on Carson's bad side just because you like to disappear from the infirmary before you're released."

"Just because you hid me from him that one time-"

"Unknowingly," Evan added, thinking how unhappy Carson had been when he'd found them at the edge of one of the piers hours after John had slipped out of the infirmary.

"He forgave you," John pointed out.

"Eventually," Evan said. He took the opportunity of their isolated situation to reach for John's hand and gently squeeze it. "He probably won't keep you long."

John huffed and squeezed Evan's hand back. "Just overnight. I swear those beds are the most uncomfortable beds in the history of beds."

Evan raised one of his eyebrows and made a show of checking his watch. "Well, right now overnight is only for three hours. And with the meeting moved, we can sleep in."

John opened his mouth to speak but was interrupted by the grumbling of his stomach.

"After breakfast, maybe," Evan suggested.

"That might be a good idea. Maybe lunch and breakfast and dinner all rolled into one meal? I'm awake, might as well eat," John said, making a show of pressing his hand to his stomach.

Evan frowned, realizing that John probably hadn't eaten since he'd been taken captive. "Once you're in the infirmary, I'll go grab you a tray if you promise to stay put."

John seemed to consider this. "Deal, but get something for Rodney and yourself too. I'm guessing you haven't had much to eat today either."

"We'll make it a picnic. If anything will get them to kick you out, that will," Evan said, knowing his smile wasn't quite reaching his eyes.

John's answering smile didn't quite make it either.

*****

Evan was woken about six hours later, not enough sleep for him to feel all the way back to his normal relatively cheerful self, but enough that he was more than capable of functioning. And worrying.

John moaned again, not lashing out but struggling against the bed. His arms were pressed up tight against his chest, with his hands in fists that rested just below his collar bone. Sweat coated his body and the elastic of his boxers was twisted against his skin as he turned and hunched his shoulders like he was trying to pull away from something.

"John, wake up," Evan ordered firmly, moving so that he was sitting up and ready to assist John awake physically if it became necessary.

The nightmares had been happening consistently every night, but they seemed to be getting more physically demanding for John. The first few nights, Evan wouldn't have known John was having nightmares at all if John hadn't gotten up and disappeared into the bathroom for a few minutes in the middle of the night. Even that wasn't exactly unusual, but John usually came back stripped out of his clothes, or one occasion he'd actually changed into a different shirt. The awakenings had gradually become more intense, John gasping and thrashing as he woke, and sometimes frantically scrambling out of bed.

"John," Evan said, pitching his voice louder and more commanding. It was a voice than anyone in the military should have responded to without thought, but John didn't seem any closer to waking up. Evan supposed that if gun fire didn't wake him up, shouting at John probably wasn't the solution.

John moaned again, twisting his body around so that he was on his stomach and pushing his legs up so he was almost in the fetal position. A tremor ran through his body and the sweat on his back seemed thick in the midmorning light pouring in from the window.

Evan resettled himself around John, tugging John slightly up so that he was resting against Evan's chest but not being restrained. John just shivered again, his shoulders pressing forward like he was trying to fold in on himself.

The fact that John wasn't forthcoming about the content of his nightmares didn't bother Evan too much. He wondered, worried, but he didn't really expect John to talk about them. John didn't talk much about himself, and when he did it was mostly evasion combined with the occasional self-deprecating comment. Evan respected that, understood that there were plenty of reasons to not bring up the past and plenty more reasons that most of John's missions were tightly classified. By the time most people reached where John and Evan were at in their military careers, silence about many subjects was something that was almost second nature.

What was most concerning about the situation for Evan was the sudden appearance of the nightmares combined with the Kamma Ket circle alongside Rodney's own obviously deteriorating condition. He had hoped that whatever they'd done had just been some ridiculous chanting along with a circle in the floor for special effects. There had been several similar situations Evan had encountered on other planets that had bits and pieces of technology that the natives hadn't quite understood the intended function of that were actually rather harmless. The pieces had just become artifacts through lack of understanding, and the more Evan thought about it he remembered pieces of what the Goa'uld had left behind on Earth that had been incorporated into myths and legends. But that didn't seem to be the case here, the circle had definitely done something to John and Rodney, though what the original purpose of the device had been was anyone's guess.

John's movements became more frantic and after a moment of struggle, he came awake with a jolt and a flurry of limbs as he tumbled across the bed.

Evan waited patiently, watching as John gathered his bearings and sunk back down onto the blankets at the bottom of the bed. John's chest heaved as he gasped for air and his hands came up so they were covering his face. Evan got up and went into the bathroom, getting John water in one of the mugs that had been left on the counter, and held it out to him when John was aware of Evan's presence next to him on the end of the bed.

"Thanks," John said after gulping some of the water.

"Coughlin says Rodney's been having the nightmares since after the Kamma Ket. Are you going to let Dr. Beckett know about this?" Evan asked, not really sure what he was going to say if John declined.

John nodded, his hands gripping the mug tightly. "Rodney's having them too. Not exactly like mine, as far as I can tell, but close. The circle did something."

Evan bit his lip, wondering if a trip back to the Kamma Ket was going to be in order. Asking to examine mystical artifacts never went down well.

"Wait, you know about Rodney and Coughlin?" John asked, looking up from the mug.

"Just found out yesterday. Was I the last to know?" Evan asked, wondering what else was happening between his and John's team that he didn't know about.

John shrugged. "Either you or me. Those idiots."

Evan laughed, leaning back on the bed and rubbing his still tired eyes. "Are we ever going to talk about this?" He asked, careful to keep his voice from sounding accusatory.

There was a long silence while John seemed to consider the question. He set the cup down on the floor and crept back up onto the bed next to Evan. "I'm not really sure what to say. I don't even know how to describe it."

"Okay," Evan said. He rolled onto his side, not sure how receptive to physical contact John would be in that moment, but John solved the problem for him by moving in to press a light kiss against Evan's unshaven jaw. Evan returned the kiss and pulled John in so that they were lying pressed against each other. John struggled when asking for affection, in any form, and Evan had long learned the signs that meant John wanted to be close. They didn't fall back asleep, but they stayed there together as the sun continued to rise in the sky.

*****


	5. Chapter 5

John hesitated only briefly outside the infirmary before he walked by, turning his head so that he could peer in as he passed. It was busy and a little noisy, he could see Carson talking with a pair of nurses and that several of the temporary beds were occupied. It was only a few hours after lunch, though John and Evan had only emerged from Evan's quarters an hour ago. John hadn't seen Rodney yet, though the only one on his team that he had seen was Ronon who had been on his way to spar in the gym. Now that John thought about it, he imagined that Rodney and Coughlin were probably still tucked away in one of their quarters, though he really didn't want to think about that. None of the rest of Evan's teammates had been seen yet either, and John figured that they were probably still sleeping.

He didn't blame them. If he thought he could get back to sleep, he would have gone back to Evan's quarters and closed his eyes in a heartbeat. Actually, he thought that if he did, he would go to sleep without a problem. Even though John was very familiar with insomnia, he hadn't had trouble getting to sleep since the Kamma Ket. Falling asleep was not the problem; John was afraid of what would happen after he fell asleep.

The dreams had gotten more disturbing, though John wasn't sure if that was a side effect of being taken captive or if it was just the progression of the dream-memory. And it wasn't that John was afraid of the contents of his dream, though he was rapidly realizing that he really didn't want to know, but he hadn't missed the looks that the rest of his team and Evan's team had given him and Rodney. There was no he could miss how Evan looked at him after he woke up. The very fine tinge of guilt was the result; John knew he didn't have anything to feel guilty about regarding his dreams, but that didn't seem to make a difference. If he didn't think it would make things worse, John would go back to his own quarters to sleep, but he had no doubt that Evan would see it as a rejection of some kind even if Evan would never say that.

John kept walking, winding up beyond the areas they'd set up for labs and storage and into the sections that were safe but they hadn't expanded into yet. Their population growth had been small, after the first wave of people when they first made contact with Earth again, and there wasn't really any reason to spread things out more than they had to. He made it as far as one of the lounges and dropped down onto one of the small couches that had been uncovered during their explorations.

He was procrastinating, putting of what he knew needed to be done because he maybe wasn't as brave as he should be. He should be the one going to Rodney and telling him they had to go to Carson to figure this thing out. He should be telling Elizabeth they needed to go back to the Kamma Ket and do whatever research they could on that damned circle. He should be acting the part of the unflappable airman who didn't even blink no matter what the situation entailed. John had never been that person; he had emulated the routine, he didn't think twice about running towards gun fire or explosions, and he would do anything for his team and his people. But he wasn't the man that he needed to be in order to do this particular task, and if his dream was as much memory as he thought it was, he never had been.

John never really thought much about his upbringing or his childhood once he'd left home. University and then the military had become his new existence, somewhere he could be something that wasn't defined by his father or his past. Occasionally he'd think about his brother Dave, mostly in moments when Evan mentioned one of his sisters in casual conversation, but mostly it was one of those uncomfortable reminders that he had a brother who wasn't a brother-in-arms. He'd wonder for a moment, imagine what Dave was doing in an entirely different galaxy, and decide that it was probably better for Dave that he had no idea what John was doing. It was probably better for both of them to leave everything in the past and pretend that their family hadn't existed. John wondered if Dave still tried to do that, even if he was still living near home and taking care of the family business.

Forcefully, John shook his head, trying to direct his thoughts away from his brother. It wouldn't do him any good to go there, wouldn't change anything, and John didn't know that he even wanted anything to change. He slouched down on the couch, allowing his mind to take up the familiar speculation about the Ancients and their peculiar habit of providing furnishings that were barely functional and not even close to comfortable. His mind felt raw and his body stiff and sore from the previous day spent in captivity. John yawned, unable to stop himself, and he swung his body around so that he was sprawled on the couch with his head resting on the armrest.

The window across from him overlooked the ocean and it was a clear and bright day, the water deep blue and this far away from the hustle and bustle of the main areas of Atlantis there was nothing to hold John's attention. Almost against his will, John closed his eyes, imagining that he could hear the ocean through the city walls. He shifted on the couch as he realized he was falling asleep and tried to remember why it was that he needed to stay awake. The false security of being on Atlantis lulled John the rest of the way into the darkness.

*****

The dream moved quickly; being surrounded by the dark, the stinging pain of discovery, his inability to speak when confronted, and then the darkness again as he waited. The wait itself was long, and John moved back in the darkness until he was pressed against the wall, still cradling his bleeding hand to his chest and nuzzling his face against the soft interior of a long winter coat. John thought that he had slept, because when the door opened again with the light from the hall pouring in, John couldn't say how many minutes and hours had passed or if any time had passed at all.

The figure in the doorway was much larger than Damian, the breadth of his shoulders blocking the light almost entirely. John blinked as he looked up and up at the man, craning his head back as his eyes tried to adjust enough to make out the details.

"What are you doing in here?" the man demanded. "Come out now."

John wasn't given a chance to respond. The man leaned down, wrapped his giant hand around John's upper arm and dragged him out. John stumbled as his sneakers dragged against the floor, his shoulder wrenching a little as the man continued to pull him up so that John was standing.

A voice from further down the hall called something unintelligible, another deep voice, another man. John didn't say anything, didn't even open his mouth to try because there was nothing to say. The window at the end of the hall was dark, which meant that it was night and far past when John was supposed to be home. John wondered if Dave was still hiding, if Dave made it home by himself. John wondered if anyone had noticed that he wasn't home, or if it was one of those nights where John made dinner for himself and Dave and no one saw if they were home or not.

The man holding John's arm walked down the hallway, still dragging John along as John tried to keep his feet under him. "It's one of the Sheppard boys," the man called as they entered the room. The man released John and John stared up at him with his mouth open a little as he tried to catch his breath. He could feel his heart racing, his body scared even though his mind was blank as the answer sheet to a test at school. All of his answer sheets have been blank lately, even though he knows the answers.

"It's late, you should be home by now. Where's your brother?" the man in the room asked. He was in a suit, his tie crooked with the knot pulled loose at the collar.

Damien's father, John realized as he looked up at the man. His eyes were the same as Damien's, and the way he moved his head to the side as he considered John was with the exact same tilt and displeasure.

"Well?" Damien's father asked, staring at John.

John didn't know the answer to that question. He looked down, his eyes fixating on the smear of blood on his shorts where he had rested his hand at some point. There were spots of blood on his shirt from where his hand had dripped. It didn't occur to John to look at his hand and see where his fingers were cut.

The man who found John in the closet looked down, his mouth sneering in disdain. "Do you talk, boy?"

John did talk, sometimes. Not as much anymore. Not when he never seemed to say the right things. When he and Dave were out, just by themselves, John would talk then. Just little things, bits and pieces of math and ideas about how things worked, and how much John wanted to be out in the sky. Sometimes, John took Dave racing down the back roads in the middle of the day on Sundays in the summer, their arms stretched out and they would run as fast as they could into the wind. But even when John opened his mouth, taking an shallow breath, he couldn't make any sound come out. He looked down, pressing his lips together and wondering what was wrong with him.

"Didn't know Sheppard's boy was mute," the man commented, his fingers digging down into John's arm.

"Take him home," Damien's father instructed, turning away from them both. "His father is probably wondering why he's out so late."

The man holding John's arm guided him out of the room, John watching as Damien's father finished undoing his tie in front of a mirror.

John wanted to say that his father probably wasn't home from work yet and it was entirely possible that no one knew he was out so late, but it wouldn't do any good even if he could make out the words. The man took John as far as the front door, his hand still tight around John's arm like he thought John might try to escape if he loosened his grasp. Mostly John thought he might bruise if the man didn't stop pulling and slow down so that John could walk normal; the bottoms of his shoes weren't quite meeting the floor until they reached a full stop in the doorway.

"Go straight home, you hear? Don't want your father calling looking for you," the man instructed.

Nodding, John turned away and took off before he had the chance to get shaken around anymore. It was easy to run down the front steps and across the yard, even though the night had come and the grass was slick beneath his shoes. The paved driveway was even quicker but he soon passed the lights at the end of the long path and was out on the edge of the road. John stopped running, mostly because it was more difficult to see where he was stepping, but at least partially because there wasn't going to be anyone waiting up for him and watching the clock. Maybe Dave, if he wasn't already in bed.

He thought that someone would be looking for Dave, if Dave hadn't shown up at home. Dave was still young enough that the handful of household staff took better notice of where he was and bedtimes and stuff like that. John noticed when Dave was up late, or when Dave hadn't had an evening bath, or when it was later than when they were supposed to have dinner. John had to notice these things for himself as well.

The darkness seemed more threatening on the side of the road, tighter than when he'd been tucked away in the little closet in Damien's house. It wasn't really cold outside, a touch of evening chill and thick dampness in the air, but John thought about the coat from that closet and how soft and warm it had been.

John wrapped his arms around himself, his palms cradling his elbows and he hurried through the long weeds in the gravel on the side of the road. The plants caught in his shoes and laces more than once and he stumbled to the ground somewhere on the stretch of road between the street lamps.

His hand stung and he could feel the cuts on his fingers reopen with a rush of wet blood and he crouched there for what could have been either a very long period of time or only a few minutes. The chill had raised goosebumps along his bare arms and legs and he pressed his knees up to his chest while he tried to untangle the shoe that had gotten caught in the weeds. John tipped his head back and stared up at the sky, the stars as bright as he'd ever seen them. A car drove along the road, its headlights flashing briefly across the road as it flew past without ever seeing him.

John shivered again in the breeze that the car brought and wondered how the thirty minute walk home seemed so much longer and foreign in the dark. He got to his feet again and started walking, feeling lost even though he knew the way.

*****

When John woke, shivering and heaving, he found himself on a bed in the infirmary with Carson at his side trying to restrain him. John managed to roll onto his side, still gagging but not quite vomiting, and gasped as he focused his eyes on his surroundings. The fabric beneath him was rough and bleached white, he could see an IV pole next to the bed - thankfully empty and not connected to him- and the wall of Atlantis right by his head. He held onto the sight and to the steady shuffle of feet and quiet noises that made up the backdrop of the infirmary; anything that was a reminder that he was on Atlantis and about as far away from Earth and that house as he could get.

"There you go," Carson said when John rolled onto his back.

"What happened?" John asked, trying to push beyond the memories of his nightmare to figure out where he'd fallen asleep.

"Major Lorne and Doctor Parrish found you out in one of the lounges when you didn't respond to your radio," Carson said as he leaned in and checked John's eyes. "When they couldn't wake you, they called for me."

John nodded, vaguely recalling walking out into the city. "How long?" he asked, ducking his head out of Carson's reach and pushing himself up so that he was sitting. He was still in his uniform, which meant he hadn't been in the infirmary for that long.

"You've been here for around forty-five minutes, though we don't know how long you were unconscious before the Major found you," Carson took a step back and folded his arms. "Evan told me these nightmares have been going on since you first woke? Just like Rodney's?"

John nodded again, looking away from Carson.

"You should have come in. Even if you didn't suspect that they had causes that weren't exactly natural, chronic sleep disturbances can be an indication that something is wrong," Carson frowned. "You can come to me, John. I'm not sure what makes you believe that you can't."

"It's not that," John said quickly.

Carson just nodded, his expression far too sympathetic and understanding for John's comfort. "I'm going to go check on Rodney and see if he's awake yet, if you'll excuse me."

"Rodney's here too?" John asked, feeling a little better as he blinked his vision completely clear and his stomach started to settle.

"Aye." Carson frowned. "Lieutenant Coughlin was kind enough to call for me when he couldn't wake Rodney. I've taken scans of both of you during your nightmares, and I'll set up another one now that you're conscious. Hopefully we'll be able to pinpoint the cause and then take steps to reduce the effects. I'd like you to stay here for a sleep study tonight."

John sighed, though it was exactly in disagreement. "Sounds great," he said.

"Major Lorne is just outside, if you're up for visitors," Carson said.

"Right, yes," John said, trying to ignore the guilty feeling that came with picturing Evan waiting to hear if it would be another week before John woke up again.

Carson nodded, pausing briefly next to the curtain like he wanted to say something more, but simply pressed his lips together and left the area with a shake of his head.

John took the moment to collect himself, shifting so that he was sitting with his legs hanging over the side of the bed and ruffled his hair where sweat had made it more unruly than usual. There was still a slight tremor in his hands and he clenched his hand experimentally. He half expected his fingers to still be stinging and sore, but there was nothing to indicate that the wounds had ever been there. Which they had, John was almost positive now. There was no way this was just a dream or a random group of things that had been tossed together from his subconscious. At some point, all of this had actually happened.

Evan entered the curtained off area, hesitantly at first but smiling when he saw that John was awake and moving about. "Hey," Evan said, stopping next to John's bed but not reaching for him.

"Hey," John replied. He could feel his eyes squint a little as he tried not to grimace, suddenly more aware than he wanted to be that Evan was upset. He ducked his head and scratched at his hair and then down his chin as he realized that he hadn't yet shaved. He had been planning on doing that after he'd gone back to Evan's quarters after lunch, and after he'd dropped by the infirmary to make an appointment with Carson, though he wasn't sure how much he'd ever intended to follow through on that.

"Feeling better?" Evan asked uncertainly. His easygoing smile, the one that John was so used to seeing, had faded and Evan seemed almost pained.

John nodded. "Same as always," he said, looking away but looking back when he realized that the curtains surrounding them were the only thing besides Evan to look at in their enclosure. "I didn't mean to fall asleep," he said quickly, thinking that it was important that Evan knew that.

"I know," Evan agreed. "Carson has a theory that whatever is causing your nightmares isn't giving you the option to control when you fall asleep. Rodney's here too, but it sounds like he's awake now."

They paused for a moment, John swallowing as he listened to the muffled and unintelligible sounds of Rodney yelling something at Carson. There was no way Rodney was in one of the curtained off areas in the infirmary from how distant he sounded; John would recognize the sound of Rodney in distress anywhere. Probably in one of the isolation rooms, John thought as the sound suddenly increased and decreased as a door opened and then shut again.

"Coughlin says that Rodney's nightmares are pretty bad. He doesn't know what to do," Evan said, his gaze following the sounds before returning to John.

John knew that Evan wasn't just talking about Rodney and Coughlin, but John didn't have any magic advice he could suddenly offer Evan either. "Me neither," he said, his voice catching in his throat. He moved his hand up to rest on his neck, wondering if he would stop being able to talk, just like in his dream. John could remember that now, more than in just the context of the dream. He remembered his teacher at school and the guidance counselor meeting with him and his father, talking about the possibility of special classes. And he remembered the frustration of not being able to say things, to open his mouth have no words for what he needed. And he remembered the relief, when people just stopped expecting him to say anything.

"Maybe you shouldn't go out into the city alone, until you know this thing isn't going to knock you out somewhere?" Evan suggested.

The careful phrasing, the way it was suggested instead of Evan coming right out and saying that he didn't want John to go do something stupid - because John's job seemed to consist of doing stupid and generally unadvisable things on an almost daily basis -told John exactly how far he'd pushed their relationship. They were both careful not to mix whatever it was between them, their relationship John supposed, with anything in their jobs; which was difficult when their jobs were their lives, but they mostly made it work. But John always knew when he'd managed to move beyond what Evan was able to tolerate in silence when their conversations moved into the stilted and awkward stage.

Evan's ability to keep both of them into a place where they could be comfortable with each other, even when John wasn't saying everything he probably should or when Evan didn't do anything more than raise an eyebrow to indicate his disagreement with something John did, was one of the things that had drawn John to Evan to begin with. Well, that wasn't entirely true; Evan's bright and earnest smile, irrepressible even in the face of certain doom, was what had made John accept that cautious dinner invitation two weeks after Evan had showed up on the Daedalus with his guns blazing and that same smile. When that smile dimmed, and Evan's requests were made like he wasn't sure that John would just walk away from him, John knew that he'd gone too far - without ever meaning to - in pushing Evan away.

"I know," John said. "I won't. I wasn't thinking."

Evan nodded, still looking pained but his smile was back. "Carson is trying to figure out what's wrong, but I've already put in a request for a return mission to the Kamma Ket. If the medical staff haven't found a solution in a day or two, I'll take my team back and see what we can find out. Maybe they can reverse the process."

John silently weighed the possibilities that Elizabeth would let him and Rodney off-world in their condition, not likely but possible, and figured it would probably be a wasted trip without them along. "Good. I'm not sure how much we'll get from them, but there's always a possibility that the galaxy might pick tomorrow to start cooperating with us."

Evan smirked, his hand reaching out to rest on John's forearm. "That's the spirit," he said.

The moment was broken by the sound of the door to the isolation room opening and closing again, though this time there wasn't any indication of what was happening in the other room. When John turned back to Evan, Evan was still staring at the curtains. John thought about trying to say something, something that would make the situation better or reassure Evan that things were fine. He had enough practice off-world; he would tell his team everything would work out, and they'd all pull together to make sure it did. The same logic should have applied here, but when Evan looked back, concern and exhaustion carefully hidden to anyone who didn't know him well, John found that he didn't have the words.

*****

John pushed himself up onto his elbow, the wires that were attached uncomfortably to his head shifting with him and leaving him feeling like he had the galaxy's largest techno-afro or mohawk. He just barely resisted the urge to reach up and touch the little sensors that had been affixed to him and couldn't help but wonder two things; first, if there wasn't a better way to do this considering they were on an Ancient floating city with tons of amazing technology, and second, how was he going to manage to get all of the gluey stuff out of his hair. It was an indication of how tired he was that both of these points seemed equally concerning.

Rodney was in the next bed over, the corners of his mouth pulled down as he shifted on the narrow infirmary bed. He looked absolutely miserable but was making no move to complain about voodoo science, or how was he supposed to sleep like this, or any number of things that John expected. Rodney turned and met John's gaze for a moment, his expression grim and vulnerable but he made a weak attempt to smile at John.

It looked more like a pained grimace than anything else, but John appreciated the effort. He tried to smile back, feeling like the memory of himself in the dream; distant and uncertain and helpless to do anything about his situation. They both looked away as footsteps approached; Evan and Jamie Coughlin slipping into the room looking conspicuously like they were sneaking in. Teyla and Ronon had already been by earlier, equal parts grim and determined that John and Rodney would be fine and if not they'd go to the Kamma Ket and make sure they were fine. John had taken this in the spirit it was meant, as he had David Parrish's offer to bring him more of his botany texts if he needed a way to pass some time.

"Hey," John said quietly as Evan approached his bed.

Evan's smile was unsteady, but he held up two small cups of blue Jello and a pair of spoons like it was some kind of bizarre peace offering. "I thought Carson might do something drastic and decidedly against the medical profession if I snuck in beer," Evan said with a little shrug.

John accepted one of the cups of Jello and moved aside as much as possible so Evan could perch at the end of the bed. "Well, you could have put the beer in the Jello," he suggested before he took a bite of the odd sugary substance. "Or at least some whipped cream on top."

"I'll keep that in mind," Evan said, poking at his Jello with his spoon. "I'm pretty sure I saw formulas for Jello shots on a white board somewhere in the labs."

"All of my scientists better be more than capable of making Jello shots without having to write it out, even if they're using Zelenka's bastardized swill that he calls alcohol," Rodney interrupted, looking up from the chocolate pudding that Coughlin had brought him.

John wasn't sure if it had been Rodney's intention, but John, Evan and Coughlin all started smiling and laughing, the most genuine John could recall for what seemed like ages but was probably only a few days ago. Rodney stared at them all for a moment before rolling his eyes and going back to his pudding, but there was a slight upturn to his mouth that hadn't been there before.

"Carson is going to contact me and Teyla, and keep us updated as they monitor you," Evan said quietly, his voice dropping as the conversation Rodney and Coughlin were having was carried out mostly in hushed whispers.

"We'll be fine. It's just like sleeping in bed, except I won't jab you when I flail about," John said, trying to sound upbeat. He had discovered as he got into the infirmary bed that he really didn't want to sleep away from Evan. It was one thing to do it off-world when he wasn't really getting much sleep anyway, and another when Evan's team was off-world and John still didn't get much sleep. But for both of them to be on Atlantis and not in a state of emergency, it was strange to not be able to lay next to Evan, even if it was only for an hour or two. It surprised him how accustomed he'd grown to having another person in bed with him, even if he still felt a reasonable amount of guilt about waking Evan up with his nightmares.

Evan nodded, not looking convinced. "Elizabeth has scheduled our mission for the Kamma Ket for tomorrow. If you and Rodney can get cleared by Carson to go, I've somehow managed to convince her that you need to be there as well."

John felt his eyebrows shoot up. "And you did this without drugging or bribing her?"

Evan shrugged one of his shoulders and bobbed his head back and forth in a way that wasn't really an answer. "I just presented the facts as they were and pointed out that you'd have to go anyway if they could fix this, and that sooner was better than later in either case."

Not entirely believing that would have won Elizabeth over, John nodded and glanced over to where Rodney had settled down on his bed and Coughlin was stroking the back of Rodney's hand. "We'll be alright," John said quietly when he noticed that Evan was watching as well.

"Yeah, you will. Good luck getting to sleep with all this though," Evan said, pointing to all the wires.

"You're the one who is going to get to help me get all of this out of my hair tomorrow," John threatened as he leaned back down against his pillow. He could see Carson waiting in the doorway and knew he was giving them a moment to say goodnight.

"My pleasure," Evan said with a predatory smile. He glanced around quickly and then leaned in, kissing John briefly but with intent.

John kissed back, his hand finding Evan's and squeezing before he leaned back. There were things he wanted to say even though he didn't know the words for them, but the best he could do was to squeeze Evan's hand one last time.

Evan squeezed back and reluctantly let go. "I'll see you in the morning. Hopefully you'll be out in time for breakfast."

"Only if I get waffles. Anything else and you can eat with your team," John said with a smile to indicate he didn't mean that in the slightest.

Evan gave him a mock wounded expression and backed away, Coughlin joining him in the doorway as Carson and a pair of nurses moved forward to do the last checks on the equipment and wires.

John wiggled his fingers at Evan as he disappeared, trying not to notice how pained Evan's smile in return had been. Carson bid both John and Rodney goodnight before he and the nurses both slipped away to where they could observe the readings without being in the room. The lights dimmed and John spent what felt like a long time staring at the ceiling trying not to move his head around too much incase he dislodged a wire. Having Rodney there helped some, helped him pretend that they were off-world somewhere and all they had to do was sit tight and wait for Ronon and Teyla, or Evan's team, to come break them out of whatever strange captivity they'd landed in this time.

Just when he was starting to think that he wasn't actually going to be able to get to sleep, John felt a wave of exhaustion rush over him and his eyes slipped all the way closed. He fought sleep for a brief moment, remembering the nightmare that was sure to follow, but couldn't resist as his breathing evened and his limbs grew heavy.

*****

The darkness surrounding him was thick and almost impenetrable and it took John a long time to discover that he was outside by the edge of the road and not still crouching in the coat closet at Damian's house. The closet and the night had briefly become one entity; a trap closing around him that was not entirely of his own making, but still better than the alternatives.

If he looked back he could just barely see the lights from Damien's house in the distance, close enough he could turn back if it would do any good. There was a moment, a moment that lasts longer than John was truly comfortable with, when he considers picking a direction he doesn't know well and seeing how far the nearby freeway will take him on foot.

Shivering, his hands chilled, sticky and grimy where he pressed them against the skin of his upper arms, John stood from where he'd taken a moment to crouch down on the side of the road. Cars drove by infrequently, their headlights blinding even as John pressed his forehead down to his shoulder, but mostly John was completely alone. The night was eerily silent, the crickets and other creatures that usually made a soft backdrop absent with only the wind tugging at John's jacket to keep him company.

He started to walk in the direction that meant home, imagining that he could see the porch light from where he was on the road even though there were several turns he had to make before he'd be able to see the house. John passed two streetlights before he moved into a patch of darkness, where the lone streetlamp before the turn off the main road had long since been burned out without anyone to replace it.

A sharp crack, like a thin branch being stepped on in the middle of fall, rung from beyond the edge of the road. The low weeds that John had been stumbling through gave away to a thicker brush further away from the road; thick enough that in the dark it was impossibly to see into even with John's sharp eyes.

John's lips made the syllables of 'hello', a question that was involuntary even though there was no sound coming from John nor an answer from the brush. He took four steps forward, trying to see by the light from the stars despite the barest amount of light coming from the sliver of the moon in the sky. He stood still as the brush rustled around him, the wind masking any movements that might be created by something else. There were many things that he could imagine lurking and waiting for someone to pass by unaware; things that were rooted in the stories he read and watched on TV, both fact and fiction. But none of these things frightened John as he stood a few feet past the edge of the road, out of sight of any car driving by, and waited for what would happen next.

A distant rumble of thunder caught John's attention and he looked up to the sky again to see clouds slowly rolling to cover some of the sky. Knowing that he was far enough from home that he would get soaked if he went back to the road and walked the long way home, John continued further into the brush. He held one hand out, the hand without the still throbbing cuts, and use it to push the thickening brush away from his thighs and waist.

The walk somehow seemed easier away from the road, the challenge of continuing to move and navigate occupying his mind and preventing him from coming to a stop as he had many times at the edge of the road. When he stumbled out onto a recently poured sidewalk, the light from a nearby house illuminating the area brightly enough that John could see the dirt covering his sneakers and the burrs and bits of weeds that clung to his socks, John felt the sensation of awareness and aliveness leak away like air from a punctured balloon. He had come out only a street away from home, but it took him longer to walk that last bit as he dragged his shoes down the cement to the corner.

As he drew closer, the light from the porch on and bright, but all of the other windows dark, John felt his chest constrict. The front door was open, just a crack like Dave had forgotten to push it closed all the day when he ran outside in the afternoon to play. But he'd never seen the door left open like that at night.

John walked up the front path, stopping at the bottom of the steps and staring at the door with his heart racing uncomfortably. As he took the first step up, the painted wood slick beneath his feet, he felt the first drops of rain falling from the now cloud covered sky and hitting the top of his head and his bare arms.

*****

It had been six hours since John had woken in the infirmary, half in a panic as he struggled away from the hands of the nurses trying to restrain him as he pulled away from all of the sensors he'd been hooked up to, all the while Rodney was shouting and struggling only a few feet away. Fifteen minutes later and they'd all been calm again, John more than a little chagrined about his behavior even though he couldn't exactly help how he'd reacted, and Rodney had slumped back onto his bed and refused to speak to anyone or even look at any of the nurses.

It had only been two hours since Carson had come out of his lab and called a meeting, saying he had pretty much nothing and apart from some of the more traditional methods of dealing with nightmares and night terrors, there was nothing he could see on the scans that indicated a viable treatment. Elizabeth had considered this information with her head bowed and John knew that she was trying to see everything from the perspective of what had the most chance of working with the smallest amount of risk and not look at John and Rodney as friends who needed her help. John had been told time and again that he only saw people, that he couldn't see the whole picture or acceptable loss; if anything he thought that being on Atlantis had only taught him that no loss was acceptable.

Now, John was standing in the 'gate room surrounded by his own team and Evan's team. They'd declined the offer of a marine escort and John had cheekily told Elizabeth that she'd better save the marines to come rescue them in a few hours. Elizabeth hadn't exactly smiled but she'd agreed to hold off on the marines for the time being, which was mission accomplished in John's mind.

Evan had just finished getting his team settled and was looking particularly grim as he glanced over their small group. The wormhole whooshed into existence and John did one last check of his own, noting the dark circles under Rodney's eyes and the fact that no one on the team looked a lot better. John had already seen himself in the mirror and noticed that he appeared a little more gaunt than usual and had resolved that this ended today no matter what objections the Kamma Ket might have about them examining the circle.

"I'll dial-in in four hours," Elizabeth said into the radio, set on a channel that only John and Rodney could hear. That they better be there to respond was unspoken.

John looked up and nodded, acknowledging that Elizabeth was both worried about them and tired of having them kidnapped or running into the Wraith or Genii at almost every turn.

"Let's go," John directed, receiving a nod from Evan to indicate that they were ready.

Evan led the way, Reed and Parrish right behind him. Coughlin stepped through with Rodney, and Teyla and Ronon went last with John right beside them.

The Kamma Ket home world didn't seem any different then the last time they'd been there, or at least that John could remember. He couldn't see any signs of a Wraith visitation that was more recent than the one that had happened on their last visit, though part of him immediately worried that the Kamma Ket had been culled and there would be no one left to tell them about the circle. Forcing that concern aside, John hung back and let Ronon take the front of the group as Parrish and Teyla struck up a quiet conversation as they all walked toward the low rise of the mountains.

When John looked to his side he could see that Evan was still worried, lines around his eyes clearly indicating his concern. John slowed down a step so that they were side by side and could speak quietly without calling any undue attention to themselves. "Nice day," John said as he gestured with one of his hands to the trees that were rustling in the light breeze.

Evan shot John a look that clearly indicated that he thought John was crazy, possibly from sleep deprivation.

"We always said we'd take a day, go off-world and see the sights. Let our scientists roam free for a bit and watch the marines play," John quipped, the twist of his mouth giving away his mostly straight expression.

Evan rolled his eyes but held his hand out for John to take. None of the team, apart from Teyla who saw everything, was looking back at all. Parrish had commented on occasion that he thought John and Evan were 'sweet' together, which had the pretty much immediate effect that they tried never to display too much affection around their teams.

"Just don't let them hear you say that," Evan finally said, quiet but a little less grim than before. "I didn't bring a beach ball, or even a frisbee."

"Good thing they're not dogs then." John actually smiled this time, imaging Evan throwing a frisbee and letting Reed and Coughlin going tearing after it. Maybe it was past time they spent a day or two off-world somewhere they didn't have to worry about Wraith attack or Genii allies.

Evan squeezed John's hand gently as they started up the incline. "After we fix this," he promised.

'And everything else in this galaxy,' John silently added, because he felt that was likely the next opportunity for a real vacation that he'd get. General O'Neill had warned him that once he was out there, even though they hadn't even heard of the Wraith yet, that his life would be permanently altered. While that was true in more ways than John could count, he thought that the one that the General had meant was how John now had a responsibility to the people of this galaxy that was forever his, just like the General and SG-1 seemed to hold themselves responsible for the safety of Earth from the Goa'uld and the Ori. They had ventured out and woken the threat, now they were bound until that threat was eliminated.

"We've got company," Reed called from the front of the line where he'd been following close behind Ronon.

John looked up and saw a small group of the Kamma Ket gathering at the edge of the field at the base of the mountain. It didn't take more than a glance to see Evan grimly setting his jaw as he glanced over the people waiting for them and John actually didn't feel much more hospitable. He was trying to not come back to the idea that these people had done _something_ to him and Rodney, that they were the reason that his team and Evan's had spent the last few weeks in a state of uncertainty and suffering. John had hesitated to say suffering, because he figured that his team was pretty well versed on suffering and nightmares weren't that bad as far as suffering went, but after listening to Rodney's frantic sobs and seeing the distress in their teams, there wasn't any other word John could choose.

"Greetings to your people," one of the Kamma Ket called as she stepped out onto the path.

"Greetings to you, and your people as well, Suanna," Teyla replied as their group came to a halt on the path. The tension was obvious, even if no one had weapons aimed or even unholstered.

"We didn't expect your return quite so soon," Suanna said cautiously as she glanced at John and Rodney. "I trust all is well?"

John exchanged a quick glance with Evan but was relieved when no one in their group, including Rodney, reacted strongly.

"Not precisely, but I believe that this is a matter that it would better to address in private with your council," Teyla replied evenly. It was doubtful that anyone who didn't know Teyla well could hear how angry she was beneath her polite words.

Suanna glanced nervously at John and Rodney again but nodded smoothly. "That can be arranged. I'll take you to the village myself. Please follow me."

The trek alongside the field and up the mountain path was quiet other than the shuffle of their feet against the worn ground. Even Suanna and the two farmers who had accompanied them seemed to catch the mood fairly quickly and refrained from making conversation or asking questions. John didn't miss the quick look Evan gave to Reed and Coughlin as they entered the cave that seemed to be the main entrance to the Kamma Ket village, undoubtably remembering that the last time they'd been through here they'd been carrying John and Rodney. Evan had never discussed the event directly with John, but Ronon had gruffly given John the details when he'd asked after a sparing session a few days after John had regained consciousness.

They were led into a small side room, one that John recognized as where they'd conducted their initial negotiations. "If you'll wait here, I will locate Diwyn and Marca," Suanna said, her eyes lingering on John and then on Rodney before she turned and left with the two farmers at her side.

John guessed that if he were to stick his head out of the thick fabric that functioned as the door he would find the two farmers standing watch outside. It's what John would do if he had potentially upset 'allies' with weapons inside the city, though he strongly doubted that the farmers were much threat to them. He'd been stabbed by farm implements before, once in the shoulder and once in the thigh, and it had hurt, but hadn't been debilitating. Though, judging from demeanor of his and Evan's teams, the Kamma Ket wouldn't be able to so much as raise a hay rake towards him or Rodney without an immediate and aggressive response.

No one sat down or even made a move towards the table, instead forming a protective and very unsubtle loose circle around John and Rodney. Even David looked fierce and somewhat threatening, or as fierce as the lanky botanist could possibly be. Before John had the opportunity to tell everyone to relax a little, or at least not look like they were about to draw their weapons, Suanna returned with Diwyn and Marca flanking her.

"Colonel Sheppard, Doctor McKay. It's good to see you and your people again. We've made all the necessary arrangements for the trades we previously arranged," Diwyn said as he scanned the group before focusing solely on John. "Would you prefer to hold council with fewer onlookers?"

When Diwyn directed his glance towards Evan's team, Evan stepped forward with no sign of his usual cordial and polite smile. "That won't be necessary. We have a request to make and then we'll be on our way."

"That is most unusual," Diwyn replied, giving an unsettled glance to both Marca and Suanna.

"The circle you placed Colonel Sheppard and Doctor McKay in has had adverse effects. We only seek to help them recover from what was forced upon them at your hands," Teyla said, just on the edge of being polite.

Marca moved a step closer, his eyes flickering from person to person as if he was the only one out of their council who truly realized how dangerous their group could potentially be when adequately provoked. "The room of the Spirits has never caused harm to anyone before. It is merely a conveyance for the blessings of the Greater and Lesser Spirits."

"We're not from your planet, it's possible that the," Evan paused and glanced at John before continuing, "Spirits, don't interact with us in the same way that they do you. And that their blessing made Colonel Sheppard and Dr McKay ill."

"Look. We just want to examine the damn circle and figure out how to reverse the effects. No harm, no foul, and we'll leave your circle thing exactly as we found it," Rodney interrupted, his mouth twisting into a tight frown.

The Kamma Ket exchanged glances again, their eyes wide and concerned. Suanna took a deep breath before she spoke. "It is not possible to reject the blessing of the Spirits once it has been bestowed. This should not be happening."

"Well it is," Rodney snapped, coming to an abrupt halt when Coughlin placed his hand around Rodney's forearm.

"This illness that has come upon Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay, you believe it was caused by the Spirits?" Diwyn asked, hesitant. "What ill effects have you experienced?"

"Diwyn," Marca said, his shoulders stiffening as he frowned deeply, even as Suanna held up a hand to stop the potential argument that was in the making.

Teyla stepped forward, ready to plead their case. "Both Colonel Sheppard and Dr. McKay have been suffering from debilitating sleep disturbances; their dreams are horrifying and prevent them from waking naturally. There is no other explanation to their sudden affliction than the circle you placed them in."

Both Diwyn and Suanna focused on John and Rodney, their expressions sympathetic.

"We understand you meant this as an honor, but we need to reverse whatever the Spirits did to them," Evan added, shifting so that he was standing in front of John without blocking his line of sight.

Diwyn nodded suddenly. "What can we do to assist you?"

"Let us examine the circle, tell us anything you know about it," Rodney said. "If I can look at the system powering it, maybe I can figure out what it did exactly."

"Of course," Suanna agreed. "We have no desire to bring further harm to your people."

"I will not be a part of this. I apologize for my involvement in bringing you harm, but I will not help you examine the means of blessing. It is a great disrespect to the Spirits," Marca said, leaving the fabric in the doorway fluttering as he fled from the room.

John felt his and Evan's team shifting around them, ready for any eventuality.

"Please follow us, we will assist you in any way that we can. I apologize on behalf of Marca, I believe that he feels betrayed that the Spirits have harmed you in such a way," Diwyn said, inclining his head first toward John and then Rodney before stepping out of the room.

They waited for Suanna to step outside as well before following. The path down further into the caves seemed vaguely familiar to John and from the way that Rodney was stiff beside him with his eyes sweeping the area, he felt the same sense of creeping uneasiness.

*****

Rodney had been bent over the circle for over an hour, various scanners and wires and two tablet computers surrounding him as he worked. So far nothing had made a peep, even after John and Evan had separately tried using the ATA gene to activate the circle, and the Kamma Ket had chanted at the edge of the circle, and Rodney had tried to connect an external power source.

"I think there has to be someone in the damn thing for it to activate," Rodney said at last, sitting down on the dusty stone floor with a grimace.

John sighed and leaned against the wall of the cave compartment that he'd been generously calling a room. Eventually they'd kicked most everyone into the hallway; John, Rodney, Evan, and the two Kamma Ket had remained inside standing at the edges of the room.

"I said I'd stand in it," David said from where he was sitting in the doorway.

"No," John and Evan said in unison, Rodney ignoring the side conversation altogether as he disconnected a clip and moved the wire to a different notch in the circle. David had already offered twice and had been met with the same response each time.

"Don't even think about it or I will leave you on Atlantis," Evan said as David shifted in the doorway.

David threw his hands in the air. "I wouldn't! Not unless I tripped or something."

"Out, out in the hall where you have two marines to keep you from falling into anything," Evan instructed, pointing into the hallway.

John tried to smile, knowing that part of the routine was to lighten the mood, but the longer Rodney huffed and scowled at the metal circle the harder it was to smile. He had known, somehow, that it wouldn't be as simple as standing back in the circle - even if it had hurt again - and suddenly they were all fixed. That didn't mean that he hadn't been hoping that it could have provided some answer or direction. As it was, they had nothing.

"I do not understand this," Diywn said quietly. He'd been standing at the back of the space the entire time, watching carefully and providing information when prompted. "The Spirits have never harmed anyone before, they would not do so. I've never seen anyone fall in pain within the circle, and they have all woken within hours."

"What usually happens?" Evan asked, moving to stand closer to the Kamma Ket.

John looked to the side but listened carefully, aware that Rodney had stopped working and was staring at the blank screen on the tablet on his lap.

"The one who has been chosen to receive the blessing of the Spirits stands within the circle as we call upon the Spirits to assist them in relieving their burden. As the Spirits retreat, the chosen one lapses into silence and stillness for the time it takes them to work through the memory that has created the burden in their mind, and when they awake they are well," Diwyn explained, oblivious to the increasing discomfort within the room.

"And that's it? They just wake up and they're fine? Like their 'burden' never existed?" Rodney asked, more skeptical and bitter than John had heard him sound in a long time.

Diwyn and Suanna exchanged glances, but it was Suanna who spoke. "No, not like the burden no longer exists. The Spirits assist those who have surrounded their memory of great loss, but not allowed it to begin to heal. By removing the barriers, the burden is then acknowledged and eased."

John forced himself to hold his head up and not give any indication of the way his throat felt like it was closing on itself. Maybe the 'Spirits' helped the Kamma Ket through their burdens, but he would have much preferred if they had left his alone. He didn't need to have nightmares to relive the worst moments in his life.

"Perhaps, if you acknowledge your burden, recognize them as moments that are part of what created you as you are today, the disturbances that come to you in your sleep will cease?" Suanna asked uncertainly. "It will undoubtedly be difficult without the help of the Spirits, but you are both formidable men. The Spirits would not have chosen you if they did not believe you were capable."

When it becomes clear that neither John or Rodney are going to answer, Evan nods quickly. "We'll take that under advisement."

They spent another hour in the room with the circle, mostly in silence as Rodney examines every angle of the circle with every tool he has before he shakes his head and starts packing up. The walk back to the 'gate is equally quiet, John and Rodney's grim mood quickly spreading to the rest of the their group.

*****

The darkness passed in a rush; the closet, the road and the field all blurring together in jumbled mess of sensations and images, stranding John on the bottom step of the front porch as cold rain drops land softly from above. John didn't know if he's even breathing as he stood stock still, only able to feel his heart beating like the string of a guitar being plucked over and over.

A splash of water dripping from his forehead down into his left eye startled John into action and he stepped up so that he was out of rain. The thick woven welcome mat, usually placed neatly in front of the doorway, had been knocked to the side. John leaned down, flexing the fingers that have dried blood coating them before using his other hand to drag the mat over to where it should be.

He rested his hand on the front door for a moment, the light from the hallway illuminating nothing out of the ordinary in the small sliver of space that he can see inside. Pushing the door so that it swung all the way open was somewhat difficult; the hinges of the front door were always stiff and the door itself heavy. Dave still had a hard time getting it unlatched by himself and John always had to remind him to make sure it was pulled all the way shut.

When he could see all the way inside, John stepped into the front hallway and looked into the dining room to his immediate left. The room was dark but empty, and John pushed the front door shut all the way until it latched. They always left the key in the front lock because there wasn't a deadbolt, and John turned it until the piece of metal inside the door was locked into the doorframe. He should take off his shoes, especially because they're so dirty, but the uneasy feeling that John can't shake convinces him that it's safer to leave them on even if he leaves marks on the carpet.

John wandered from room to room, finding each still and empty. There wasn't any sign that dinner had been prepared in the kitchen or that anyone had eaten at the side table where he and Dave usually ate. The first floor of the house was completely empty, even the office where John is never supposed to go unless he's called in there. John had cracked the door and peered inside without actually stepping inside, but he was certain that the room had been vacant.

The staircase seemed longer than usual, like it's taking forever for John to climb to the top. He had turned on and off the light in each room as he entered and left, leaving the light on the main hall so that he could find his way back. The upstairs hallway light was off and when John pressed the light switch the first thing he noticed was the door at the end of the hallway was cracked open, just like the front door.

He ignored it for the time being, checking Dave's room first and then his because sometimes Dave liked to stay in his bed instead of his own. Both bedrooms were silent and empty, Dave's bed still unmade from that morning with his pajama's in a pile on the floor in the middle of the room. The bathroom and Dad's bedroom are both empty, and John even checked the linen closet. He found an action figure and a small group of blocks on the lowest shelf, leftover from the last time he and Dave had been playing and the closet had been the secret base. He left the toys alone and shut the closet door.

John knew that he didn't want to go down to the end of the hallway. He wasn't supposed to go in that room either, even though he snuck in when he thought no one was looking. He walked, feeling more like he was floating, and the door opened as soon as he pressed his hand against it. Seeing the bed in the middle of the room empty, the white sheets thrown back and a pillow left fallen on the floor was the only answer John needed.

He stepped on unsteady feet, making it to the edge of the bed and finding his hands closing on the thin robe that had been draped over the foot of the bed. He held the fabric against him, barely aware of how cold he felt or how hard it was to draw a breath. Sinking down to the floor, the hardwood floor cool against his face as he curled up, John held the robe against him as he closed his eyes and tried to hear the sound of labored breathing that should be in the bed above him.

*****

When John woke up the lights were already on, if still dimmed, and Evan was halfway across the room with his radio in hand. John felt like he's been choking in the night, his throat ached and it was difficult to draw an entire breath. The memory of standing there in the doorway of his mother's bedroom was fresh and vivid in his mind. John felt like old scar tissue from a wound that had never really healed had been peeled back, leaving the wound just as gaping and bloody as when it had first been inflicted.

"John?" Evan asked, coming back to the bed and sitting down on the edge.

John didn't fail to notice that Evan hadn't put down the radio and he was wearing clothes that would be appropriate if he had to call a medical emergency over the radio. It had happened more than once over the past week and John figured that Carson was close to ordering both him and Rodney into the infirmary at night. They'd already been relieved of all but very light duty and John had been pretending not know that Elizabeth was a hair's breadth away from being ordered to send them both back to Earth.

"John? You with me?" Evan asked, his hand hovering close but not quite touching John's shoulder.

Raising a hand to his throat, John swallowed and licked his lips, half afraid that when he tried to speak words would not come out. "Did you already call Carson?" he managed, his voice quiet but audible.

"Not yet. I was about to because you were gasping like you couldn't breathe," Evan set down the radio on the bed and ran both of his hands through his hair. "John, I wish you'd-"

The chime of the door cut Evan off before he could finish his thought, but John was pretty sure he could fill in the end of that sentence in a variety of ways and have them all be perfectly true. His chest ached like he'd been punched and felt so tight that it hurt when he forced himself to breathe out and then back in again.

Evan sighed, looking like he wanted to say more, but he stood up as the door chime rang again.

John got up and reached for where he had dropped his pants on the floor, checking his watch to discover it was four in the morning. Anyone knocking at their door in the middle of the night was going to be announcing a crisis of some kind and John could only hope that it wasn't Wraith spotted on the long distance sensors or something else that was threatening to destroy the city.

"Jamie?" Evan's question caught John's attention, and John finished buckling his pants before hurrying over to the doorway.

"John," Coughlin said, looking alarmingly distraught for a marine who faced down Wraith on a regular basis without batting an eye.

"What happened?" John asked, moving back so that Evan could guide his teammate into their room.

Coughlin sat down on the desk chair that Evan pushed toward him, his shoulders hunched and his expression pained. "Rodney was having one of the nightmares. He was freaking out when he woke up, wouldn't even talk to me, didn't want me to call Doctor Beckett. He yelled at me to get out, and he's done that before, but this time he meant it."

Still aching from his own nightmare, John nodded and turned to the door, letting Evan catch his hand briefly and squeezing in return as he moved away. He heard Evan starting to speak quietly to Coughlin and purposefully ignored the content of the words. He didn't want to hear exactly what Evan thought of the situation and his and Rodney's inability to cope well enough. The door slid closed behind him and John walked barefoot the short distance down the hall to Rodney's quarters.

He pressed his hand on the door chime, waited for thirty seconds because he didn't actually expect Rodney to answer, and then used his gene to override the locks to open the door and step inside. The door closed behind him and John nudged the lights up enough that he could see to avoid obstacles. Locating Rodney slumped on the floor near the windows, John carefully navigated his way over and stood a few feet away.

Rodney looked up briefly, staring at John like he didn't recognize him before leaning his head back against the wall and letting it roll away.

John sat down where he was standing, leaning against the side of the bed with his legs stretched out across the floor, and stared out the window at all the still somewhat unfamiliar star patterns scattered across the night sky. The sat quietly for a long time, the occasional gasp for air from either of them occasionally breaking the silence. When the sky started to lighten, the stars disappearing as the color became a dusky grey, John began to speak of all the things that he'd been remembering as they sat.

"My mom," John said to the window, the words starting to peter out, "she was gone and she hadn't been out of the bed for more than a year. I knew what had happened, but I didn't believe it. One of my uncles came back in the middle of the night, found me curled up sleeping on the floor of her bedroom, and he told me she was dead." Saying it out loud makes the memory feel sharper, the edges pressing into him as he relives sitting blankly at the bottom of her empty bed and not able to say a word in response or even cry.

There was a harsh intake of air from where Rodney was sitting but otherwise no response.

Just when John is starting to wonder if he had done the right thing, if exposing this dark place inside of himself was actually doing more harm than good, Rodney got to his feet and walked to the other side of the room.

"When I was young, five maybe, my uncle - my mother's brother - stayed with us for a while. My parents had separated, one of the many times they did for a week or two, and when they did we would usually stay in the house with my mother. And she was busy, she worked, she didn't want spend all her time at home with me and my sister," Rodney said, stopping suddenly as he turned. He pressed one of his hands to his forehead, his eyes squeezing tightly shut for a moment before he resumed his pacing.

John shifted on the floor, turning so that he could keep an eye on Rodney without watching him directly. Rodney had done him the honor of listening without making him feel uncomfortable or watched; John would do the same for Rodney if Rodney would let him.

"I didn't even understand, I couldn't. I-" Rodney broke off again, walking over to the window so that he was staring out at the water. "In the dreams, the nightmares, I remember him putting us to bed, because my mom wasn't home. I remember his hands."

John pushed himself up so that he was sitting on the edge of Rodney's bed, knowing there was nothing really he could say.

"I need to go back to Earth. I need to see my sister," Rodney said suddenly, sitting down so that he was next to John.

"Okay," John agreed, wondering if going back to Earth for a few days might not be such a bad thing. Maybe going would help the dreams to stop, and John thought at this point it might be better for them to volunteer to take leave rather than be forced out of Atlantis.

They sat together on the edge of the bed, watching the sunrise while lost to their own thoughts, John ignoring the way that Rodney's hands were shaking even as they were pressed together and the way that it still felt difficult to swallow even as he took steady breaths.

"I've got things to do, if I'm going to request time off," Rodney said, pushing up to his feet.

John stood up and nodded. "Me too," he said, turning toward the door. Just as he was about to step away, Rodney reached out and pressed his hand against John's arm. Rodney held on, his entire body shuddering as he met John's eyes.

After a second, John reached out with his other hand and rested it on Rodney's arm. They stood together, the contact somehow helping John feel significantly more awake and real than he had felt since coming back from the Kamma Ket planet three days ago.

*****

John walked through the graveyard, the midwest sun already pressing down on his shoulders and a slight breeze ruffling his hair and the leaves of the trees that were scattered among the grave markers. Evan was right behind him, quiet since they drove from the airport along the long road to the town where John had spent part of his childhood. It had taken John a little while to remember his way around, but after pulling into the parking lot near the graveyard John had known the way to his mother's grave without having to even think about it.

They had left Rodney and Coughlin back at the SGC, knowing they had tickets to Canada in the morning and that they were in good hands until them. Officially they were all on a much deserved vacation; unofficially they were on sick leave until John and Rodney were ready and able to return to Atlantis.

John had spent the hour they were on Midway station, while Rodney and Coughlin reconfigured whatever they needed to go through to the SGC, sitting in the back of the Puddle Jumper with Evan and explaining his memory-turned-nightmare; all the way from the beginning and not being able to speak to his mother's bedroom. Evan had been supportive, more than John had understood that he could be, and had immediately accepted when John had said he didn't want to go see his father or Dave.

They reached the grave marker easily enough, John bending down to brush the handful of leaves and dust away from the stone. The touch of the stone was enough to bring back the funeral to John, the silence in the grave yard, feeling lost and untethered. Without having to be asked, Evan's hand wrapped around John's and John held on tightly.

When he felt a little more grounded, like the grass was back firmly beneath his knees, John took a slow breath. "I would sneak into her room sometimes, in the afternoons when I got home from school. Dave would go out to play, and even though I was supposed to watch him, he had his own friends. She'd let me lay next to her, and we'd watch the fan on the ceiling, and even though I didn't say anything she always knew."

Evan knelt down next to him, letting John settle so that they were next to each other. "She was your mom, of course she knew."

John smiled and nodded, glad for once that someone, that Evan, was in his space. "She did, and she'd tell me about when she was young and went she traveled. She went all over the world, and saw everything. She told me that's where I got my wanderlust from."

"You were made to go to far off places," Evan agreed readily.

"Yes," was all John could say to that. The truth was that sitting with Evan, talking like they were, felt like the farthest away he'd ever been.

*****

Epilogue

They hadn't stayed long in John's childhood town, Evan had taken one look at John after they'd left the graveyard and determined that despite John's recent openness on the subject matter it wasn't a good place to stay overnight. Evan had already called his sister, letting her know that he was off assignment for a little while even though he wasn't sure he'd get the chance to visit, but when he'd offered the opportunity to stay out in California for a little while John had jumped at the chance.

Evan looked up from his sketch of the water and the beach, watching John sprawled out on a towel with the tips of his ears getting sunburned as he dozed. There was a surfboard next to him and Evan tagged along every morning as they went out so John could surf on a different beach. Things hadn't been one hundred percent better since they'd visited the graveyard, but John's nightmares had been becoming less pronounced and John would occasionally mention a detail or two from them without being prompted.

He'd run through the entire spectrum of emotions over the past few days; joy and relief at seeing his family and spending time with John when they weren't running for their lives or trying to prevent a catastrophic disaster in their precarious home in another galaxy, anger and grief for what John and Rodney were going through and how the simplest things from an alien culture could alter all of their lives, and hope that they would keep living their way through it all.

Coughlin had called that morning to tell them that things were going as well as they possibly could, and that they were staying for a few days with Rodney's sister to sort through some things. Evan knew that John had gotten a separate phone call from Rodney shortly after, and had given John some space for them to talk even though he guessed that their conversation was mostly filled with silences. He didn't think that mattered so much though, as long as John and Rodney were doing whatever it was they needed.

Evan went back to his sketchbook, working in short lines for the waves of the water, thinking how amazing it was that he could sit next to the ocean on Earth when they'd just come from exploring alien planets. Nothing was like he'd ever imagined it would be in his life, much more worry and heartbreak and fear than he'd thought possible. But, they were making their way through all of it, and would go back to Atlantis and to their home.

John shifted on his towel, draping one of his arms over his eyes to block out the sun, but the movements were relaxed and easy - nothing like the jolts and shakes from during his nightmares. Evan smiled and started sketching in some of the spires of Atlantis from memory, bringing the city back to them.

The End


End file.
